Back To You | Jerrie

Chapter 25

Perrie

Every muscle is tight as if someone is pulling me apart from the inside out. She kisses me languidly and ardently. All I want is more. I want aggression and roughness because the tenderness is breaking me. I want to forget. I need to get lost in her and for the world to fade away. No jobs, no loss, no sadness ... only us.

Her lips leave mine as she kisses from my neck to my collarbone. "I've missed you so much," Jade says quietly as she pulls the strap of my dress down, exposing my shoulder.

I close my eyes and memorize the way her lips feel against my skin.

She lowers the zipper of my dress. "We don't have to do this," I say unsure of what I'm feeling. She bared her soul, told me about the loss of her wife and child—it feels wrong knowing tomorrow I have to leave.

Jade turns me to her, cups my cheeks, and waits for me to look at her. "I need you. I need every part of you. You make me whole."

My chest is weighted by her words because I'm going to hurt her. I know I am and I think she knows it too. "Just for tonight," I say hoping she understands. "You have me."

Without answering she lowers her lips to mine, stopping all conversation. I close my mind off. If I think about what this is, it'll kill me. The loss that this woman has endured, the pain that we've caused each other, is too much. But if she needs this, then she can take from me. I've taken enough from her.

"You're so beautiful," Jade says letting me know she in no way takes this moment for granted. My dress comes off. She leaves on my heels and I lie here as she admires me while taking off her uniform.

"Let me," I say, sitting up.

Each button that I undo I lose a part of myself—a part of us.

Trust. I trusted her. I trusted us—but we failed.

Another button.

Hope. We shared hope that we would be enough for each other.

Another button.

Security. She made me feel safe, loved, adored.

Another button.

She stops my hands from moving and she removes the tears I try to stifle. "Stay with me."

I nod as her shirt falls. She removes her undershirt and my eyes fall to the scar on her chest. It's no longer red and angry, but it serves as a reminder of how close I came to losing her forever. The scar marks a time that I will never forget. But I don't want to remember any of it because it'll make telling her about the job that much harder. My stomach churns and I struggle to hold it together.

"Jade, make me forget," I plead. I need to do anything but feel.

Her lips crush mine and she lays me down. I relish in the way her tongue dances with mine, volleying for control. When her hands softly graze against my body I shiver. The weight of her on top of me holds me together. Her arms press me against her and I'm whole once again.

Releasing me, she never breaks eye contact, forcing me to stay in the moment and not retreat into my head. Jade's eyes swim with emotion, but she slowly moves her lips to mine while she removes my bra.

"Every part of you belongs to me," she whispers against my lips.

"Take me."

Slowly her tongue glides to my neck as she makes her way to my chest. When her mouth latches on to my nipple, I cry out in pleasure. Jade's tongue circles it slowly and then she licks her way to my other breast, lavishing it with the same attention.