First

Chapter 53

"Guys! Fall back! No, not over there. Check the houses. No! Alex!" Jace cried, jolting me from my sleep. I tried to move but I was locked in his arms.

It wasn't until I fully woke up that I realized I was sweaty and wet from Jace's body heat. Not wanting to move for fear that it would trigger something in Jace and send him deeper into his nightmare; I gently shook him and called his name. "Jason, baby, wake up. You're having a nightmare; you're here with me, not there. Please Jace. It's okay."

Jace suddenly went completely still and silent before he jolted awake. He sat bolt upright, pulling me with him, still trapped in his arms. Jace looked from side to side, trying to orient himself as he squeezed me tighter. Even though his hold was becoming painful, I didn't say anything. Instead, I stayed silent, giving him some time to calm down. Once he finally realized where he was, his eyes landed on mine and he slowly released his death grip on my body. I wrapped my arms around one of his and trailed kisses over his shoulder and bicep. Jace was breathing heavily, his chest rising and falling rapidly.

"Sh, it's okay," I soothed. "Take a deep breath." Jace did as I said and lay back down. I stretched out beside him. "Do you want a drink of water?" I asked gently.

Jace nodded almost imperceptibly so I padded quietly to the kitchen and filled a glass. Just as I was heading back to our room, my mom came out of the hers. "Everything okay?" she asked. "We heard a commotion. Is it Jace?" My parents were all too familiar with Jace's nightmares and panic attacks. He'd lived with us long enough for my parents to see his dark side which was one thing he hated.

I nodded. "Yeah," as I brushed some hair out of my face.

She stepped out of the doorway. "Is he okay? Can I do anything?" she asked, concern lacing her voice.

I shrugged my shoulders. "He's still coming out of it. It was just a nightmare but with him, they're never just nightmares." I rocked back on my heels, anxious to get back to Jace. After a nightmare I never liked to leave Jace alone for too long.

Suddenly, our bedroom door opened and Jace stepped out, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. "Baby?"

"Jace." I hurried over to him and laid my hand on his chest. "What are you doing out of bed?"

"You were taking a while and ... and the quiet and dark was getting to me," he admitted, whispering in my ear. Jace pulled me into his side and pressed his lips to the side of my head.

My heart broke for him; I squeezed his side and rested my head on his chest. His heart was beating rapidly and it was only then that I noticed that his face was pale and that his eyes were red. Tears formed in my eyes at the realization that he'd been crying because of whatever he'd seen and been through. I gently squeezed his side once again before I let my hand wander up to his back so that I could rub soothing circles. "Come on; let's get you back to bed." I broke away from him and looked up to see my mom giving us an odd look.

I was trying to figure out why she was staring at us the way she was. It's not like she hadn't seen us embracing like this or seen how we interacted after Jace came home before. But my mind was too tired to try and decipher the look so I left her staring after Jace and I as we retreated back to our bedroom.

Jace was silent as he sat on the edge of the bed and I instructed him to drink the glass of water I had brought him. I realized then that Jace hadn't said anything since he had woke up except for when he had come looking for me. The silence bothered me more than I would like to admit. The thought that he was slipping away and withdrawing from me once again crossed my mind but I quickly brushed it away. Just the thought alone scared the living hell out of me.

"Are you okay?" I asked, crawling on the bed behind him and pressing butterfly kisses all over his back.

Jace took a shaky breath and set the cup down on the night table. "I'm okay," he said, leaning back against me. I could tell that what he needed was more than words, it was physical touch. I pulled him against me as I scooted back toward the headboard. I let his weight sag against my chest and I sighed; feeling his solid form squishing my body was like a balm to my soul. My fingers glided through his hair as I rubbed my hands over his chest.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I asked, needing to ask but also knowing his answer; he'd been giving me the same one all day. "I'm here for you if you need to unload."

"I need to unload but not in the way you're thinking," Jace replied, trying to lighten the mood but the joke fell flat between us. I wasn't in the mood to joke but the fact that Jace was trying to lighten the atmosphere made me feel somewhat better. Obviously the nightmare hadn't affected him as seriously as I'd originally thought. Or it was wearing off. Either way, I was happy. All I wanted was my Jason back.

When I didn't reply to his attempt at a joke, Jace pulled out of my arms and reversed our position. Suddenly I was in his arms with my head on his chest. "Kadence... look at me," he demanded lightly. I tilted my head up so I was looking into his deep blue eyes. "I am fine." When I gave him a doubtful look, Jace amended his statement. "Okay, fine. I'm not okay, but I will be, Kade. We've been over this and over this. We will talk about it; about everything. But I just need time to process it all."

"I know that, baby. I just wanted to reinforce it," I said, pressing a kiss to his chest.

Jace shivered and slid down the bed. His lips found mine and we sank into each other. I knew that Jace was using me for comfort, to chase away the nightmare but if that's what he needed me to be, then I would, no questions asked. When we finally pulled apart, we collapsed back on the bed, gasping for breath.

"I love you, Kadence. So much."

"I love you too," I whispered gently.

Jason and I snuggled together on the bed, our legs and bodies intertwined.

"Are you ready for bed now?" I asked. "Or do you want to stay up and talk some more?"

Jace yawned, pulling me against his chest and I immediately had my answer. "Bed and sleep sounds good right about now," he said, his eyes drooping closed. I didn't reply; I didn't need to. As soon as his eyes dropped closed he began emitting soft snores. I smiled and breathed another sigh of relief.

Idrifted off to sleep soon afterwards, held tightly in Jace's arms; there was noway he was going to let me go. And I didn't mind one bit, it meant that hewould sleep through the night; I'd be able to instantly tell if he slipped intoanother nightmare. I just prayed to God that this was as bad as it was going toget. This—this screaming and thrashing—I could handle. But if he started actingout his nightmares, I didn't know what I'd do.i~L9