First

Chapter 60

After a moment I said, "I'm so sorry you had to hear that," as I kissed his shoulder.

Jace shrugged his shoulders. "It's okay. It's not your fault. Nothing she said wasn't true anyway." He picked up a handful of sand and let it slide through his fingers. I watched, mesmerized.

"I still wish you hadn't heard it," I sighed. "I don't want this to be any harder on you that it already is," I admitted.

Jace blew out a breath and pulled me into his lap. "Come here," he said, wrapping his arms around my back. He took a deep breath, kissing my forehead tenderly. When he pulled away, tears were shining in his eyes.

"I'm so sorry for what I did; I can't even begin to tell you how sorry I am... If a man loves his wife, he should never lay a hand on her. I grew up with that. I never thought I'd become my father; I swore I never would. But here we are." Jace hung his head but I forced it back up to meet my gaze. "I'm just like my father."

"Jason no, you're not. You are nothing like him," I replied, panicking.

"Yes I am!" he cried, placing his hand on my neck. I had no doubt he was matching his hand to the bruises on my skin. "Have you looked in a mirror lately?" he whispered.

I shook my head in anger. But before I could argue, Jace continued on. "Kadence, I'll never be able to forgive myself for what I did to you."

"I forgive you, Jace. Doesn't that count for something?" I asked.

"That's not enough Kadence. I need to know that I'll never hurt you like this again. I can't in my right mind put you through this again."

"Jace...please..." I knew what he was trying to say but my mind wasn't willing to believe it. "Don't do this."

"I have to, Kadence. I love you so much... but I can't do this anymore. The only way I can ensure you're safe... from me," he gulped, "is to let you go. I can't put you in any more danger." Jace paused and looked me in the eye. And when he spoke, his voice may have been breaking but it was full of resolve. "I'm sorry Kadence. But I have to let you go. The wedding is off... we're off. I can't be selfish with you anymore."

I sat there for a moment in stunned silence. Jace couldn't do this; I wouldn't let him do this. "Jace no..." I sobbed, shaking my head in denial before throwing myself into his arms. He didn't hug me back and it broke my heart. "Jace, no, please. We can work this out. You know we can. You're just taking the easy way out," I accused, anger now taking over.

"Kadence, I don't want to do this; it's killing me just to say the words." He forced my body away and held my face in his hands as tears streamed down his face. "I love you so much, Kade. But I don't want to hurt you anymore than I already have."

"Then don't do this, Jace!" I cried. I knew this was only going to hurt him more but I needed to say it. "You're hurting me by doing this. Just please, stop and think about what you're saying, Jason. Are you really willing to throw the seven years we've spent together away over something that we can fix?" I begged him. "We've been through so much."

"I don't want to let you go," Jace replied simply.

"Then don't," I repeated. I interlaced my fingers through his where they grasped my face. "We are stronger together, you know that. Don't do this on your own, let me help you," I pleaded. I would do anything to save our relationship; I couldn't remember a time before him. And I didn't know that I'd survive a life after. Jace was... he was my everything. My heartbeat, my , my reason... everything.