The Kidnapper's Wife

64. Before

I'm so happy I could cry. And in fact, I might cry. I would even say it's likely that I will cry. These baby hormones have got me all messed up.

Today is the day we tell our families about the baby. It's only been two months, but we feel ready, at least to tell them the good news. Mostly I just can't contain the news anymore. We made a video message to send Connor's parents earlier this morning. I still have never met or spoken to them, but I'm sure it means a lot to Connor to let them know about their grandchild, so I played along in the video gamely, speaking to the camera and trying to not imagine strangers watching.

But now that awkward experience is over and we get to tell my family! They are going to be so excited.

It took me a long time to figure out how to break the big news to them. Should I give them clothes like I wanted to give Connor? I ruled that out pretty quick, the whole idea of that was ruined for me after his reaction.

Although I have to say, even since his change of heart, Connor has been a model husband, and a model soon to be father. He transformed one of our guest rooms into a nursery, just the way I always pictured. We still don't know the gender of the baby, so we are doing a yellow nursery. The walls are yellow with a white polka dot border on the tops, and bead board up to the waist. There's a beautiful white crib Connor made, a rocking chair, a changing table with cabinets, and bookshelves. I've been painting them all with yellow trim to match the walls. We got stuffed animals, blankets and toys for the little girl or guy. It's all so perfect.

Connor's also become obsessed with baby proofing. From the cabinets to the stairs, everything is slowly becoming baby safe (and simultaneously Jade proof too in some cases...I don't know if I'll ever get the hang of the cabinet safety locks). I think even Ruby can sense something, or someone, is coming.

Sometimes, during the day when Connor's not here, I go up into the nursery and rub my belly, taking in the cozy, padded window seat, the little rocking giraffe in the corner, the array of stuffed animals hanging on a clip vine from the ceiling.

It's exactly as I always pictured it. And Connor made it happen.

I can't wait to show my family the nursery. But first, I have to tell them about the baby's existence.

I've decided, after the disaster with Connor, not to tell them in a cute way. Instead, I plan on just telling them during dinner. Then I can show them the nursery, and gush about it with them. I'm a little disappointed not to get to see their surprise and delight at some little trick I've thought up, but I've decided it's better to play it safe. I don't know if my heart can take any more rejection right now.

When I told Connor my reasoning, he felt so bad. He tried to convince me to do something fun anyway, but I wouldn't change my mind. No more silly games, I just want my family to know.

I couldn't resist theming the meal around babies though. I know they won't notice, but I'm serving oatmeal apple bread, veal with a side of baby peas, and a cake made with cheerios for dessert. I thought it was clever, but I doubt anyone will notice, my family isn't observant that way.

Sure enough, an hour later I'm serving up the main course and no one blinks an eye. Elizabeth is laughing at something Abby said, and my mom is telling Connor about something she saw on the news the other day.

I told Connor I'd tell them during dessert. I pause for a minute, taking in the moment. They have no idea the happy news that is about to hit them.

Suddenly, Connor stands up next to me.

"Before we have dessert, I thought I'd make everyone some coffee," he announces.

"Oh I'm good," says Elizabeth, "Can't have caffeine this late or I'll be up all night."

"Your going to want to try my new recipe," says Connor, "Don't worry I'll make yours decaf."

I don't remember Connor mentioning a new coffee recipe, but don't spare him too much thought as he disappears into the kitchen. My mom launches into a discussion of the Redskins football team prospects for the year, and my family is so into a debate over whether or not we should keep our quarterback that I barely notice when Connor returns with a tray holding mugs of hot liquid, and begins passing them out to everyone.

"Thanks," my dad says to Connor as Connor places a mug in front of him.

Connor nods and sits next to me, as I lift my mug to my lips and take a sip. To be honest, it just tastes like normal coffee, nothing special, but just in case he's expecting praise for the recipe I smile at him encouragingly, mouthing "yum" to him silently.

His eyes are dancing as he smiles back, looking very happy that I like the coffee.

"I'm telling you," my dad is ranting, "If we let him go, that's the end of our team! The quarterback can't carry the whole team, and Marvelo is fine, it's the rest of the team that needs to step it up! I was telling Abby-"

"Calvin." My mother is looking at her coffee with a strange expression.

"Hold on Eleanor, let me finish my thought, I was tell-"

"CALVIN." My mother is insistent now, her tone firm, her eyes still focused on her coffee cup.

My dad turns to her, annoyed at the interruption. "What is it Eleanor? I'm trying to tell a story."

"Look at your cup." she says, her voice still strangely off.

We all stare at her coffee. It looks normally brown.

"Is something wrong with your coffee dear?" my father asks impatiently, "Ask Connor to get you another one."

"No."

"Well what are you on about then?" my father sounds annoyed now.

"Look at the cup."

I look at the mug itself, and suddenly notice that the flowery pattern on it isn't just decorative. The flowers are arranged into a word. The word 'grandma'. I look at my Dad's mug. Sure enough 'grandpa' is inscribed upon it. 'Aunt' marks Elizabeth's, 'Cousin' is on Abby's, and 'Mom' and 'Dad on Connor and I's.

My mouth drops open. I look at my dad, who seems to have figured out at the same second I did. He looks up at me with tears in his eyes.

"Jade! Is this...Does this mean?"

"Yes!" I jump to my feet in excitement, "We're pregnant!"

"Oh Jade!" my mother exclaims, running around the table to hug me.

"Congratulations!" shrieks my sister, as Abby bounces up and down in her chair.

"Oh Jade, this is just wonderful news," my mother gushes, "I'm so excited for you!"

"Thanks Mom!" I smile over her shoulder at my dad, who is dabbing at his eyes, trying to be inconspicuous.

As we all sit back down at the table for dessert a few minutes later (I've promised to show the nursery afterwards), Connor jumps up. He walks over to the corner of the room where I didn't even notice the camera sitting on a tripod. Popping out the camera's SD card, he hands it to me.

"Now you can always remember this happy moment." he says, smiling at me.

I stand and give him a kiss. Connor made this moment exactly how I dreamed it would be. The way I dreamed his reaction would have gone. He more than made up for his reaction to the baby news by letting me have this, even when I didn't think I wanted it.

As I sit back down in my seat, all I can think about is how much I love my husband.