Riverdale Imagines

Old friends [j] ☀︎

Attempts of suicide
Hope you enjoy!
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Y/n's pov
People who matter don't mind
They don't need all of my time
Somebody told me to light up every room
Make them remember you
But nobody here knows what I'm going through
No, they never do

I stood looking at my old friends, Archie, Jughead, Veronica, Betty and Kevin, laughing at each other.
I looked at my feet and my long sleeves sweater when it was 87 degrees. People keep telling me to change and show people that I'm out going and preppy like my new friends because I've been like this since I've not been friends with the crew. Everybody thinks I'm a happy person but I'm actually depressed about everything going on. My parents got a divorce, my brother ran away from out family, I broke away from my old friends, but mostly because my and now ex boyfriend broke up.

I miss my old friends
'Cause they know when I need them the most
I made some new friends and they're cool friends
But they don't know
What I do, what I got, who I am and who I'm not
I miss my old friends
I miss my old friends

I faked smiled at my "friends" and looked back over and saw my old friends once again laughing, I miss them so much. I lifted my sweater and looked at my previous and old scars. A tear slipped from eye as I looked up.
"I'll be right back." I said as I wiped away tears the pooling out now. I stepped back and walked past the people that I missed so much. Nobody knew who I was, nobody knew what I do to myself everyday, but nobody knows what I'm not. I'm not selfish like other people, I'm not fake like most people, I'm not open like some people, I'm not happy like a lot of people.
It was like slow motion when I walked past them, with tears pouring from my eyes, streaming down my cheeks. I felt their eyes on my broken body, on my hurt broken body.
My sweater was lifted up to my elbows exposing my blade marks on my wrist to mid forearm. I felt everybody's eyes on me. I was ashamed of myself. I was ashamed of my mistakes.
I want the people that know me most to come back to me. But I made the mistake to walk away from them.

I miss the good times we had
Now I don't know who's got my back
And somebody told me to light up every room (to light up)
Make them remember you (I don't remember you)
But nobody here knows what I'm going through
No, they never do

I got to the bathroom and saw nobody was in there so I let it all out at once. The tears, the sobs, the unhappiness. I looked at myself in the mirror as I thought 'I hate myself'. My head fell to look down at the sink as I kept saying those 3 words I hate myself.
I just want my friends back, I want to make me happy as they always did. I want my boyfriend back so he can make me happy again. But nobody will come back, nobody will have my back.
I looked at my wrist as more tears streamed down my face as I knew today was my day to leave.
"I'm so sorry Jughead. I'm so sorry Archie. I'm so sorry Veronica. I'm so sorry Betty. I'm so sorry Kevin. I'm so sorry mom. I'm so sorry dad," I looked at myself in the mirror I spoke. "I'm so sorry y/n."

Hey now, hey now
I know everybody changes
Hey now, hey now
I just want familiar faces
Oh, hey now, hey now
Growing up can be amazing
But it can even break your heart

I walked out of the bathroom showing who I was, showing that I was hurt. People say that I changed to depressed freak, but if you just think about it, I've been unhappy since the start. I just was go away and never come back, I wanna see my old friends but I wanna die the most. I guess I had an amazing life with my best friend and my boyfriend but my now horrifying life will be gone and non-existence.
I got out a piece of paper to write a letter for everyone.
Dear everyone,
The first person that will get this is Archie Andrews, Archie I need you to pass this on to Veronica lodge and then Betty Cooper, Kevin Keller, my mom and my dad and then Jughead Jones.
What I'm saying here is that I'm saying goodbye. Goodbye. I'm leaving...forever. My life is at risk. But it's already to late to save me. I'm already gone.
I've made a big mistake this past year. I broke up with my boyfriend, I broke away from all my friends, I got mad at my parents all the time. I just want to forget all of this. I'm so sorry guys. I'm so so sorry. I've hurt so many people that it was enough to hurt myself. I'm sorry.
I love you all so much. My love for you guys is endless. But it's my time for me go. For me to leave. For me to die. I've been feeling like this for months maybe even years, but I never showed.
For you guys at school that saw me cry to the bathroom that was the day I was writing this. August 12th, 2017, 10:11 am. Which is also when I left or for me now, leaving.
Archie, please protect everyone.
Veronica, please love everyone.
Betty, please never change.
Kevin, please always be yourself.
Mom, please don't cry.
Dad, please be there for mom.
Jughead, please smile...for me.
I love you guys, goodbye.
Love, y/n y/l/n.
I miss my old friends
'Cause they know when I need them the most
I made some new friends and they're cool friends
But they don't know
What I do, what I got, who I am and who I'm not
I miss my old friends
I miss my old friends

I folded the paper and walked out of the school and walked to Archie's and put it into his mailbox. I looked at his and Betty's house. Such good memories. I smiled slightly for the first time in forever. Was I going to regret this. I tear slipped as all the good memories came to me.
Im so sorry
I got home and a sob escaped from my mouth as I walked to the bathroom.
Goodbye
I slid down the wall as I hurt myself more than I have ever done.
I love you so much
I looked at all the blood on the floor and on my arms, all over my body.
I'll miss you
I felt my life becoming to an end. My last tear fell from my eye as I spoke the last words that meant so much to me as it was my last breath.
"I love you Jughead."
Darkness was soon what I saw and will always see.
Goodbye Jughead
Archies pov
I was walking home with Jughead as we talked.
"Did you see y/n today?" He said as he looked at me, I nodded as I looked at my hands.
"She looked so hurt." I said as I looked back at him.
"I didn't even try to help." He looked down at his shoes.
"Don't be ashamed of yourself Jug, we all should of helped, not just you." He nodded as we got to the house. I walked to the mailbox and saw a letter. It had my name followed by y/n's name. I furrowed my eyebrows as I walked inside and saw Jughead was already up in the room.
I opened the letter the first think I saw was goodbye.
After ready the letter I had tears in my eyes. I couldn't pass this one all at once. Jughead deserves to know now.
"Jughead!!!" I yelled as tears ran down my face. He ran down the stairs and came straight to the kitchen.
"Archie what happened?" He said as he saw the tears.
"Y/n" I said but it was like I couldn't finish the sentence.
"Y/n? What's wrong?? What happened??" He said as he looked worried and concerned at the sound of
Y/n's name.
"She killed herself." I said as I looked at him. He was frozen and then he ran out of the house as quickly as possible.
Jugheads pov
"Y/n!! No!!" I yelled as I ran to her house. Tears were running down my face as I kept hating myself for this. She needed help and I didn't even try. I knew she was unhappy when we dated but she acted so happy all the time and knew she had the genuine smile on her face. It was all a lie.
I ran into her house as I quickly got to her bathroom. The door was unlocked so I busted through and saw her lifeless body on the floor.
"No" I whispered to myself as I knew she was gone.
"No!" I sobbed out as I broke down  beside her. The love of my life was gone.
"I love you so much y/n. I will always love you baby girl." I said as I kissed her cold lips. Tears fell onto her face, her body, mixing with her blood, her tears.
"Goodbye." I said as the I picked her up wanting to the one to hold her.
"I love you Jughead." I heard y/n's voice as it was like she took her last breath when she did.
"I'm so sorry Jughead" I shook my head.
"Don't say sorry baby girl." I said as I brushed my fingers threw her hair as I heard the ambulance.
"Goodbye Jughead"
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