A Heart In Two | YuTae

Two.

Taeyong is stupefied, he had never thought that Yuta was in love with him, with wide eyes and lips un-moving, the shock too much for his brain to process and suddenly the image of Jaehyun flashes into his mind and he pushes Yuta away, there is hurt in those once bright doe eyes but, Taeyong can't do this, he can't betray the one he loves and even if Jaehyun won't know about him making out with Yuta, the guilt will slowly eat him from insides, making his skin burn, heart sinking and mind cloud in despair.

"Yuta, this ... this isn't..." Taeyong doesn't know how to form the sentence and tell him that it is wrong, oh so wrong and they shouldn't be engaged in something like this. Yuta already knows that he is in love with Jaehyun and soon getting married so why is he trying to mess up the friendship they have? Taeyong loves Yuta, he really does but, it's not in a romantic way and he shouldn't be expecting Taeyong to love him back when he will be tying a knot with Jaehyun and, starting a new life in a few days. Taeyong knows that he is hurting Yuta but, he can't bring himself to wipe those tears away, which are streaming down Yuta's pretty face. Hands balled into fists, he simply looks away.

"Taeyong, please." Yuta croaks out, not bothering to wipe those tears away and with red rimmed eyes and blurry vision, he reaches to hold onto Taeyong's hands. Yuta is desperate for his touch, anything that can soothe the ache of his broken heart. He knows that Taeyong will never shower him with the love that he is craving for but, he wants to be selfish just once.

"Just this once and I will let go." Yuta blinks away the tears, not letting go of Taeyong's warmer hands. Yuta wants Taeyong to give him the love that he craves for, claim him his even if it's only for a night and treat him more than a friend. Just one night is what he is asking for.

"Yuta, I can't. You know why." Taeyong doesn't meet his eyes but, he can hear the despair and wariness in his voice. Yuta knows the reason but, it's only for a night, is it too much to ask for when he will be letting go of his feelings?

"Just shower me with kisses and love for a night, that's all I ask. I want to be loved, even if it's just temporary and for a few moments, I want to be yours." Yuta says, voice trembling as he cups Taeyong's pretty face, thumb grazing over his bottom lip.

Taeyong would be lying if he says that it didn't hurt when Yuta shed tears and asked to be loved, just for a night doesn't seem anything to bother about if he wasn't in love with Jaehyun. Taeyong knows that he will never be able to see Yuta the same, their dynamics will surely change and maybe he will start to avoid Yuta too. The sinking of his heart when he looks into those doe eyes, sadness and hurt evident in those makes him unable to breathe for a second. But, wouldn't he hurt Yuta more if he spends the night with him? Giving him false hope and Taeyong will never be able to return his feelings nor ever make Yuta his.

Taeyong is Jaehyun's in every way.

"Just love me once, please." Yuta closes his eyes, the unshed tears slowly streaming down his cheeks and rests his forehead on Taeyong's. His breathe hitting on Yuta's lips, mingling together and Yuta controls his urge to claim those soft lips again albeit it being the most difficult task ever.

Taeyong retreats back and Yuta feels the warmth slowly dissipating as the warmth is replaced by coldness. Taeyong refuses to look at him, the boy who has always been by his side, crumpling into nothingness while Taeyong's heart is being shattered slowly. There is nothing Taeyong can do to soothe Yuta's pain because Taeyong is the reason for Yuta's heartache. He could be Yuta's antidote if Taeyong wasn't in love with Jaehyun. Only if he wasn't.

"Please, leave." The words feel bitter and heavy with a hint of regret and sadness but, that's the best for both of them. Taeyong can't give in no matter how much Yuta asks for it. Taeyong turns his back on Yuta and Yuta feels so lonely, he ruined the only relationship he could have with Taeyong: their friendship.

Yuta had always received indirect rejections, which did hurt but not as much as the direct rejection and detest from Taeyong's soft lips. It affected him more than it should have. What was he expecting anyways? It's not like Taeyong would give in to what Yuta wanted because his request was absurd. With a broken and bleeding heart, Yuta makes his way out of Taeyong's apartment, wishing that he didn't come here. Maybe wishing more on why did he have to fall in love with Taeyong who never reciprocated his feelings and is going to start a new life with Jaehyun.

That night Taeyong couldn't fall asleep, thinking how much he had hurt Yuta, his best friend.