Gamble on Love

Chapter Fifteen

It's been two weeks.

Two weeks since Lucas professed his love for me.

Since I broke his heart.

Since I broke mine.

He's in love with me. How can he love me when I can't love myself?

He didn't stop calling and texting. He's left me dozens of voicemails. He's even turned up at my house but I never opened the door. I couldn't.

But he's stopped now. He's left me alone, like I wanted him to. So why aren't I happy?

Because you actually did fall in love with him but you didn't want to admit it.

My bedroom door swings open and Kiara stands in the doorway, glaring at me, hands on her hips. "What the fuck did you do?"

"He told me he was in love with me." My voice was emotionless.

"And?"

"I told him I wasn't in love with him, said horrible things, then left him outside."

Kiara storms to me, where I'm lying pathetically in my bed. "You fucking idiot!"

I blink at her. "What? Why are you angry with me? You were the one who told me this was a bad idea!"

"Because I thought he would hurt you, not that you would hurt him." She shakes her head. "Rae what happened?" She softens her voice.

"I fell in love with him. How? I've barely known him for that long." I whisper.

Kiara rolls her eyes. "There's not a fucking schedule when it comes to love. Like oh yeah in approximately two weeks and three days I'll fall in love - no. Love doesn't work like that Rae."

"How the fuck does it work then?"

"I have no fucking idea. It just... happens. You have to go with the flow and trust where it takes you. You have to jump and trust they catch you."

Petulant, I frown at her. "That's a shitty explanation."

"I don't believe love has an explanation. It's just something you feel. And you know it when you feel it. You can't control it." She continues her deep and meaningful bullshit spiel.

"Well I'm fucking trying to anyway."

"And how's that going?" She snaps at me. "For fuck sake. You're scared I get it. But you can't let your fear control you. You don't want to end up like your parents so you-"

"Wait," I interrupt her. "What do you mean I don't want to end up like my parents?"

"Your view of love is warped. The only love you've ever witnessed is your parent's fucked up marriage. So you believe all love is like that. News flash babe: it isn't. Your parents are one couple. They aren't you. And you are not them." I stare at her, amazed by what has come out of her mouth. Was she right? Do I have a warped view on love? She continues, "Take a gamble on love, Rae. If it doesn't work out with Lucas, so what? You tried. Don't be scared to try because it could end up being the most amazing thing ever. If you don't give him a chance you'll spend the rest of your life regretting it."

I lay in stunned silence. "Where the fuck did this wisdom shit come from?"

She smiles at me. "I'm not just a pretty face."

Tears suddenly fill my eyes. "God I'm fucked up." I choke out.

"Aw babe. Everyone's fucked up in some way. Nobody's perfect, you live and you learn it."

Despite the situation, my lips twitch in amusement. "Did you just quote Hannah Montana?"

"Bitch you love Hannah Montana." Kiara says, looking smug at my nod of agreement. "So what are you going to do?"

I suck in a deep breath. "First I'm going to shower. Then I'm going to have a conversation with my parents. Then I'm going to go get Lucas back."

Kiara's grin widens with every sentence. "Yay! Go girl! Go get him tiger!"

"Kiara?"

"Yeah?"

"Do me a favour and never ever say that again."

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A/N: Yeah I know this is short. Bear with me.

Who agrees with Kiara on her view of love and her wisdom? What's your opinion on love?

Please vote and comment as usual!