That Blue-Eyed Boy

19. SECRETS

POV:  STELLA

"Stella, you've been acting weird lately, are you sure you're okay?" Gemma asks as she drops her books on the kitchen table. I'm currently in the kitchen making a ham and sardine sandwich because I've been having a weird craving for them recently. "Last time I checked you hated sardines."

"I guess my taste buds have changed." I shrug, and stuff the sandwich into my mouth, savoring the salty taste.

"What about the hurling that I woke up to this morning? Stel, that's not normal." She argues, and again I shrug.

"I ate some bad chicken last night."

"Okay, you keep telling yourself that, babe." She shakes her head while I polish off my sandwich and kick back on the couch to binge watch Supernatural before I take a mid-term tomorrow.

"Have you talked to Beau recently?" Gemma asks, removing my feet from the coffee table when she sits beside me. I check my phone and shake my head.

"Not since August when I left again." I sigh, thinking about our reconciliation over the summer.

"Not a single phone call? No text? Nothing?" She cries, grabbing at my phone to check my story and I hand it over, rubbing my temples. "That wuss."

"I can't say I blame him though. We tried the long distance thing before and it obviously didn't work then, so why would it work now?"

"Yeah, but it's so frustrating because everybody knows y'all are gonna end up together in the end, so I just don't understand why y'all are fighting it so much." She sighs, and grabs the remote to turn on Netflix.

"You're telling me. But it was his idea and once his mind is set, there's no changing it. Maybe after next semester when I move home to start my own business and help Beau run the place we'll start something more permanent. I'm just glad he was there for me when Dad died, and he's done a pretty good job of running the place since." I sigh, missing my father. It's been nearly two years since his heart attack, but that doesn't mean it gets easier.

"I'm just not sure that all of this 'on again, off again' crap is good for you, my love. You're different, and I'm worried." She murmurs, and curls up on the couch with me with her microbiology textbook in her lap.

"I promise I'll be okay, Gemma." I smile while the show starts.

-

"Dammit, Stella, I have got to get some sleep and I can't do that if you're throwing up at all hours of the morning." Gemma groans, flipping on the light in the bathroom in the morning.

"Apparently I still don't like sardines." I groan, sticking my head in the toilet again as another wave hits.

"I don't know, Stella. Weird cravings, throwing up, getting emotional with me, I think you might be –"

"Don't say it, Gemma. I know what you're going to say so don't say it. All of these things are just coincidences." I mutter, closing my eyes and leaning my forehead against my forearms.

"I won't say I told you so when you find out the truth. And could you please keep it down? I have a midterm at 9 and I need to sleep."

I sit on the floor of the bathroom trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together, but no matter how I do the math, it doesn't add up. It's literally impossible. My stomach feels better now so I stand up and rinse my mouth out before heading back to my room to curl up under my covers and catch a couple more hours of sleep before my midterm at 11 that I'm not worried about at all. I wake up after Gemma is gone and the house is eerily quiet. It makes me miss the nights that Beau would spend here during my first year of college. We'd wake up late and I'd skip my morning classes and we'd sit on the couch laughing and feeding each other cold waffles.