Sexual Frustrations

10. Familiar faces

Everybody raced over to the hospital once they found out Carl was awake...except me.

I did want to see him don't get me wrong but it was a very touchy situation and I wasn't sure how much he'd appreciate me being there. First of all, he has no idea that I know about his drug problem.
Second of all, I disappeared on him for 3 years. This was an intense and pretty scary time I didn't want to invade that emotional privacy. And I didn't want to awkwardly intrude on any family interventions.
And last of all, I wasn't even sure how I felt about the whole situation. I didn't know what kind of response to give him or what to say or how to actually even feel about it all.

So I guess I just figured it would be best if as far as he knew I was never at the hospital and I still had no idea about his drug problem. I spoke to Fiona and she was understanding and promised to secretly keep me in the loop.

I was just sitting watching the Tv trying desperately to stop thinking about Carl and what was going on when I heard a knock at the door. At first I assumed it would be Lip coming back from the hospital but I wasn't expecting him so early, I'd gotten a text only 10 minutes ago saying Carl was going in for head scans.

I cautiously opened the door and I was completely and utterly shocked to see my old friend Mandy standing there.

We both stood in shock just staring at one another for a moment, it was such a surprise to see her there.

"Oh my god." I whispered suddenly feeling emotional again. I was such an up and down mess.

"I can't believe you're here." She squealed before giving me the biggest hug possible.

"Me neither." I laughed as the tears trickled in my eyes. I hadn't even realised how much I'd missed that whole group until she was standing right in front of me again. She looked older, more mature, but really really good.
"Come in oh my god." I gushed wiping the tears from my eyes and leading her over to the couch. I was so shocked to actually see her again.

"How are you?" She beamed looking genuinely happy to see me.

"Emotional." I laughed. "God everything just so surreal." She nodded in understanding.

"It's been a while." She sighed and in came the guilt again.

"I am so sorry for just leaving its just-" I began my attempt at explaining myself but she cut me off.

"Don't worry about it I get it." She smiled sincerely and for once I was glad to feel the guilt leave me.

"So so tell me what's going on."

And she got into explaining her life in the past three years. She got into college and she's studying to be a nurse. Her workload is pretty heavy but she is absolutely loving it. She was so so excited to hear about my position in the production company and how well everything was going for me over there. And then we got into the topic of boys...

"So no hot Australian boys in your life?" My mind briefly flickered to Luke but I decided against getting into that.

"No not interested in anything serious I'm just enjoying having time to myself."

"Oh I feel you on that one." She laughed.

"So you and Jack aren't together anymore?" I assumed and she nodded. I figured they would have lasted a lot longer.

"Jack sort of did a runner as well. He got accepted into a college interstate and off he went. None of us have really heard from him since." She sighed and I felt bad for her. But then again that's exactly what I did to Carl so how bad could I really feel?

"Aw I'm sorry."

"Don't be, it wasn't working anyway we were better off apart."

"Yeah I know how that feels." I sighed. "So do you still speak to the rest of the group?" I asked and her face sort of fell. Judging off her expression I remembered when Carl flipped out at me for asking him the same question. Maybe something was going on.

"Yeah I do." She answered vaguely. She looked concerned and almost nervous. Something was definitely going on.

"Do they know I'm here?"

"Yeah Carl told us." That answer shocked me. I figured something bad had happened but If they were all still speaking, maybe I was getting the wrong message.
"I just wanted to come see you first and talk to you about something."

"Okay?" I prompted not really knowing what to expect at all.

"So obviously Carl's not been his usual self and I know he's been involved in some bad crowds..." she began and I was actually surprised she knew a bit about the drug problem. I guess it was pretty easy to pick out on him.
"And he's been really weird since you left but um... I don't really know how to tell you..." she groaned and I got really nervous.

"Just spit it out." I laughed awkwardly feeling extremely anxious.

"Carl and Emma have been sleeping together."

Her words hit me like a tonne of bricks but I didn't quite process what she said straight away.

"What do you mean..."

"Like they've been having sex and have for a while now." She sighed with a very cautious and sympathetic expression.

I felt my stomach completely churn and I could've sworn I might've thrown up. I was waiting for her to turn around and tell me she was only joking but it never came. I couldn't believe it. Emma was my best friend, she spent so long helping me out with my messy situation with Carl. She wanted us to be together. How could she do this. How could he do this.

"I feel sick." I admitted.

"I know I'm so sorry Ava I was horrified when I found out but when I heard you were back I thought you deserved to know."

To be honest I didn't really want to know but I knew that if it was Carl or Emma that told me I would have completely flipped out.

"I'm glad you told me." I managed to choke out. Honestly I wanted to cry again but I didn't want to be so fucking weak. I left at the end of the day that was my decision.
"I guess I can't really be mad."

"Um yes you can." Marry defended me. "We both listened to her bang on about you and Carl for months and as soon as you're out of the picture she jumps on it?"

"It's pretty gross isn't it?" I was so glad she was making me feel better about being angry.

"Plus she knew Carl was in a pretty vulnerable spot and she's just been on him like a leech but he's not himself." She ranted and my anger was growing nastier by the minute.

"Are you guys still good friends?" I had to ask.

"Not really. She's so weird now such a bitch and she's so all over Carl it's pathetic. Carl's not his usual self either. So I only really bother with Tyler and Marty but occasionally those two show up." I couldn't believe that Maddy was the one to remain such a good friend to me after what I did and it was Emma that fucked me over.

"We should meet up again?" She suggested and I wasn't sure I entirely loved where that would get me...

...

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