Everything »mfz and jvo (discontinued)

chapter 5

edited

•broken.why?•
mack's pov

for my luck, we both end up crossing paths. he's walking towards me and all i did was act natural. he hasn't seen me like this since my ninth birthday where i didn't get the doll that i wanted. don't judge me, i was a bratty little girl.

"oh hi, long time no see kenzie" sophia smiles, and i return the smile to her. maddie turns round and says hello too. i didn't really get a chance to talk to her at the party due to my explained disappearance.. "long time no see indeed" i reply, looking at johnny. he remained silent and did not attempt to say a single word. "since when do you two hang?" i ask. maddie shoves me but i shrug. "since yesterday. great party by the way" sophia says, laughing a little. i rolled my eyes at the fact that she was badly informed about yesterday and look at johnny.

my eyes met those green eyes that had not one but several sparks of gold in them. all i wanted to do was drawn in those green bubbly eyes and i did , i was drowning in them and sinking in until well, Maddie got me back to reality. we both break eye contact and look at the ground. this is well awkward.

"sorry. i like daydreaming..." i reassure sophia and maddie. "i do that way too much" sophia giggles and i attempt a giggle too, but it came out way too fake. mads shoves me once more and apologises in my behalf. although i don't believe there was anything to apologise for.

"we should probably go in... our movie starts soon" johnny says, breaking the awkward silence. sophia nods and so do maddie and i. "what movie are y'all watching anyway?" maddie questions. "fault in our stars" soph replies and i smirk. i don't exactly know why i smirked but i did. "what a coinkidink, we are too!" i say laughing. johnny sighs and starts walking towards the door, i quickly grab him and whisper 'thanks for yesterday'. he merely looks at me and walks into the movie theatre.

maddie walks in behind him leaving me and soph alone for a few. "it's been a while, yes, but you've always known that i liked johnny. so back the fuck off mackenzie. you won't take him this time." she tells me and walks into the theatre. yikes.

***

sophia had already fallen asleep on johnny's chest somehow and maddie was now sat in front of us with jack, who by coincidence showed up at the theatre too and when he saw us he came and sat down with mads. he doesn't live here but he's been hanging in l.a for a while. so i was sat beside johnny and sophia. pda is sure to happen.

then came the sad part. no one was there to hold me tight while I cried to the fact that augustus was gone. forever. and that hazel's cure might not even keep her alive forever and that i was just relating to everything in the movie even though i don't have cancer and my boyfriend hasn't died.

i wipe my tears and put my feet up on my seat and curve into a ball, i felt a pair of soft fingers touch against mine and I immediately look up and see johnny holding my hand and smiling while he looked towards the screen, my lips form into a slight smile and i held his hand tighter. a shuffle is felt and we see that sophia had woken up. i quickly let go of johnny and he sees why. i obviously looked away. i wish i had left. at that exact time.

i look up to find johnny and sophia smashing against each others lips and i was shocked. i was right. pda did happen and it happened right in front of me. i was about to cry, but i held it in. i had to be strong.

i looked at the front corner of the theatre and see a familiar brunette head. it was hayden. i'm sure of it. he was cuddling a girl. i couldn't tell who but it broke me. it's only been a day. they giggled and moved closer to each other. i couldn't take it anymore. i look at both from left to right , right to left and break into tears. I ran as far as I could choking on my own tears. i hear a muffled sound but i couldn't even stop to look I was crying way too much.

"MACKENZIE! KENZ WAIT UP!" someone yelled in the far distance. i looked back but everything was blurred, they were running after me but i didn't and don't care anymore. i ran home, no one was home so i ran up to my room and searched through the drawers, to find something specific. an old friend of mine. a razor.

i look at my wrists and then back at the razor. back and forth. i stare into my wrists in deep thought. this addiction is bad and once you start, there's no going back. pain will feel more like pleasure, and i should know this seeing as the razor was the oldest friend in my drawer.

i dig the razor into my wrists and make small cuts along side it , not one or two way more than that. this is the start, the start of an addiction that i thought i could leave behind. my phone was buzzing, way too much.

23 missed calls , 25 unread messages

UNREAD MESSAGES:

john: mackenzie where are you?!

john: please answer what happened...

john: kenzie answer the phone.

mads: KENZIE WHERE ARE YOU WE'RE WORRIED SICK

mads: COME ON PLEASE ANSWER

and they went on...

7 missed calls from Johnny

9 missed calls from mads

2 missed calls from hayden

5 missed calls from lolo

i sat there on the bathroom floor against the bathtub crying in pain... no. this can't be happening. not again.