You're Not Yourself

Today is Not The Day

I keep getting the message that I cannot do anything right... I sometimes don't feel like getting anything done and I just give up all of a sudden, thinking that my time in this world was a complete waste of time. Then there's another part of me that says that today is the day, I'll become more to something to people and that today was the day I do the things I did before the time I went through such a rough time in my life, I felt weak and hopeless and that I'll never be successful.

Today, I missed my train to get on time to college and felt once again like I'm missing out on something so great and yet I've become this lazy sloth that doesn't have any clue on what he wants to do in life.

I've missed the past way too much only because there were friends in my lifetime who inspired me and pushed me to do what I loved and supported that dream of mine and told me to go further and make that dream come true. now I'm honestly left with nothing but a camera I barely use in my life trying to figure what the right thing to say to my audience.

I need a break from what happening now with the social media and get back on track on doing what I love which is filming but seeing all the issues that have been happening it affecting my work on the way I write and make stories come to life on video.

I will get rid of this lazy part of me today and tell myself why was I this person who gave up at one point I could have went further and have done so much more in life than worry about the little things in life.

Like having this want in driving a car and getting my license.

Make more films but something is toping me from getting the work done or wanting to start a new project.

I want to finish up my first biography but with the friends who I've lost in some of the chapters it's a waste to write about now that they're not my friend, then again there are new people in my life in meeting and could write about them too but my lazy side doesn't want to finish it.

Todays just a day I don't care about anything, Sorry :(

I'm not going to college today I'm just not feeling it.