lust; malec au

chapter seventeen

Alec could see the nightmare play behind his eyelids. He was standing at the top of a building, but when he looked down all he saw was water. The ocean. Sharp rocks swam in a single file down the waves, the whistle of the wind wrapping around Alec's body crushingly. His body spun around soundlessly, and he could see the figure of someone standing in front of him.

Even though the person had no face and looked grotesquely deformed, he could tell it was Marley. He was holding a bottle of pills, the bottle of pills looking all too familiar for Alec. Alec felt a wave of sadness flow over him, and he began to sob. He felt fear rush through his veins.

Alec gasped loudly as Marley pushed him, his arms flailing out in front of him to try and cling to Marley, failing. He began to screech and scream as his body starting hurtling towards the water, a falling sensation swirling in Alec's stomach and reaching every part of his body.

Magnus shot awake as he heard screaming, jumping up from his spot on the couch and rushing towards his bedroom where Alec had been sleeping. Putting a hand on the doorframe to stop himself from running, Magnus' eyes widened as they laid on Alec. He was writhing and screaming, his eyes screwed shut and Magnus' sheets balled into tight fists.

Running over, Magnus put a hand on Alec's arm, saying softly, "Alec, wake up. It's okay." At first, Alec pushed Magnus away. It took a moment for Alec to realise what was happening and where he was, his eyes shooting open and a gasp emitting from his parted lips. His chest heaved up and down, scratchy breaths leaving his mouth and reflecting off Magnus' bare chest.

"Are you okay?" Magnus asked, worry laced into his voice, and his eyebrows furrowed in concern. Alec sat up shakily, breathing in deeply and putting a hand on his chest to try and stop the rapid beat.

Alec swallowed a lump in his throat, shrugging off Magnus' touch. "We didn't have sex, did we?" Was the first thing Alec said, never thinking the day would come when he hoped he hadn't had sex. Magnus shook his head, trying to ignore the rejection. "You tried to, a lot."

Ignoring the fact that his cheeks went pink and he turned away, Alec cleared his throat. "As soon as I feel less hungover, I'm gone. My siblings are back home now, so I don't need you." Alec shot him a short deadly smile, rubbing a hand over his throbbing forehead.

Magnus said with an optimistic expression, "Your siblings are back? How did that happen?" Alec let out a sad sigh. He wasn't sure if it was the large grin Magnus was giving him, or how shitty he was feeling, but he began to feel a twinge of tears scratch at his eyes. The tears were for Max, the image of his limp body on the road flashing to mind.

"My brother, Max, he didn't make the trip back. Isabelle is still in the hospital, but she's okay. Jace and I have been grieving at home, but he went out to see his girlfriend and so I decided to go to Marley's party. I miss Max so much." Alec covered his eyes with his hands, beginning to cry silently into them.

Magnus felt pity for Alec and everything he had been through this past week. It seemed as though everything bad that could happen, was happening. Magnus knew he couldn't let Alec be alone now, in fear of Alec's ongoing battle with himself.

"I'm so sorry, Alec." Magnus put a hand on Alec's shoulder, Alec letting him. He just needed the contact right now. Alec was so hot and cold with Magnus right now, his entire attitude shifting as he wiped his tears away and tried to escape Magnus' hold.

Alec said, "I'm not letting you take advantage of my grief. I'm still not happy with you." Magnus thought Alec might be over-exaggerating slightly, but was ready to put up with it to earn Alec's forgiveness. Magnus just wanted Alec back in his life.

"You almost had sex with Marley," Magnus said, the words rolling off his tongue with a bitter taste as he looked down at the sheets. Alec quickly got defensive, "Why do you even care? You probably had a threesome with that boy and girl I saw you talking to at the party. I didn't forget about that."