The Edge of Everything

Chapter Seven

Just a warning. Flashback involves sensitive material.

The party was in full swing. The music was loud, the people were high and drunk. I hated these parties. I hated that Tomas found them fun and always found a way to drag me to them. He always made me feel guilty when I wanted to stay home. He was insanely jealous whenever I considered ditching him and these stupid parties to spend the night with Cassian instead.

So I let him talk me into this one, I held his hand as we walked around and he handed me a drink. I had been nursing it for at least a half an hour. I took a few sips and I didn't feel in control of my body. I held Tomas's hand as he pulled me up the stairs. But the room was hazy and I knew it wasn't from the smoke that surrounded me.

Tomas pulled me up the stairs and into one of the dark rooms. He smiled as he kissed me, his hands were rough as he grabbed me. He pulled me against him so hard I let out a gasp. I wanted to push him away, I didn't want this. I wasn't even sure why I was here.
"Nesta," he whispered my name as my tongue got bigger inside my mouth, "I love you Nesta."

I shook my head, the words caught in my throat. I didn't want this. I didn't want him. But I couldn't form the words, I couldn't push him away. My body wasn't mine anymore. It belonged to someone else.

I tried to scream, but nothing worked. Tears were in my eyes as he pushed me down onto the bed. I was crying as he touched me, his hand going to the button on my jeans. I kept shaking my head, fighting the darkness that threatened to take me under. But my body stopped listening, I stopped fighting as he pulled my pants down, his hands everywhere on my skin. I closed my eyes, just wishing it would be over soon.

"Nesta," it wasn't Tomas that I heard. The voice was soft, as if it was coming through a tunnel. The touch on my hand was gentle.

I kept crying. A hand brushed against my cheek.

I opened my eyes before I saw the rest of my dream play out. I gasped for air, making sure my body was mine again. Cassian was holding my hand, my heart pounding in my chest. The beeping from the monitors was loud and fast, telling me my heart was indeed pounding inside my chest. I let out a sob as I realized it had been a dream.

And yet part of it had been my reality.

"Shh it's okay," he whispered brushing my hair out of my face, "it was a dream. You're okay."

I nodded, wincing at the pain that filled my body. I shifted slowly, my body was sore. I groaned as I turned my head and looked at Cassian sitting there. I took in a deep breath, which was a bad move. I exhaled and it felt like shards of glass entered my lungs.

"Nesta," his voice was soft, "are you okay?"

A flash of Tomas coming at me played behind my eyes. The fair, he cornered me. Rey was in Cassian's arms. It all came back with a sudden force, I would've sat up if my stomach wasn't killing me. I brought my eyes back to my best friend. Then I nodded slowly, "yeah. Are you? Did he hit you?"

He shook his head, "no. He didn't touch me. But you. You've got a bruised rib. He kicked you when you were down," he ran his thumb along my cheek, "and I wanted to tear him apart for hitting you."

I closed my eyes. My voice was broken, "Rey?"

"Feyre and Rhysand took her to his house."

I sighed with relief as I opened my eyes. Cassain squeezed my hand gently, letting me know he was still here. I looked at the hospital room slowly, avoiding his eyes. I hated hospitals. I winced as I sat up slowly, Cassian moved the pillows so I could lean against them. I sighed as he brushed his hand over the bruise that was still tender on my cheek.