True Mates

Chapter-12

I admit I did hurt.

I new I only had known Juliet for what like 5 seconeds. But just seeing her petit little body being put down into her grave hurt like hell. Tears escaped my eyes as I watched Skye put her body down and start to bury her. I didn't get why I was crying thou I was practicaly born on and battle field my whole life I have watched families go to war and have seen many come back and other cry because there loved ones were gone. But this this was different kind of pain. I felt as if soemone had stabbed me not julet not Skye but me. I wasn't really sure how Skye was feeling because he hadn't looked up or met my eyes since Juliets death. I didn't understand why I felt this great depression.Why did I feel like this I didn't know it was a mysterie to me. I felt as if my soul was going not her's. I felt so far away from myself. I felt as if I was looking at myself in someones else's point of view. I just didn't understand anymore. The same questions were running through my head. I just didn't understand myself anymore. I didn't know who I was anymore.I felt like I had lost control of my own life and let an evil demond was taking over my body and I had stoped fighting it and embraced it into my body. I felt my life was just a vage memory in my mind. It was like Juliet as taken over my soul.She has taken it and killed mine. I felt like I was a broken toy that couldn't be fixed. I felt I was the one that was being buried not Juliet but me. My life has just gotten even more worse then it already was.

I really did believe I was broken and well I was dead on the inside. I felt as if my life has been taken. I felt Juliets pain. I was the one who should have died not Juliet. More tears leaked from my eyes. Maybe I was dreaming maybe I would wake up from this dream at any moment.But I sadly new the truth.I wasn't sleeping I was fully awake. I was in too deep of thought to niticed it started to rain.

I felt hauted be my own gost.

I thought Juliet had died but know she didn't I died and skye was just a gost hauting my pain as well as juliet. I really didn't understand my life anymore. I felt as if I was imaginary to this world. Like no one could see me or sense my presense. I was just a gost that lingered on earth.

I had too many feeling right at those very moments I just wished they would all go away and lieve me alone.Let me live in silence.Thats all I wanted right at the momnet was silence.Yes silence that  my friend was my little out let.It was beautiful.Yet no oone understood it they thought it was boring but my thought were that they were beautiful. Not boring not plain just beautiful maybe even magnificent.

But those were my thought and my feelings.

Not others.

I finally snaped back to reality when I saw Juliets grave all done and covered with a wet madding dirt. I hoped she really does rest in peace. Not pain. Like I am now.Its like there would be no savation in my life. I am and always will be denied.

I deciced that if I was going to die and I new my deathw as coming soon but I couldn't embrace it with it would also come for Skye. I new I had to do the right thing.

"Skye." I said firmly.

"Yes." He wispered as he leaned on the shovel and just started at the grave.

"You turn back please." I wispered. Skye seemed pretty surprised by my words because when I said them his head wiped in my direction.

"What." He asked in surprise.

"I'm sorry but you must go back home and not look back."

 I said as I looked at the ground.

"W-what Renee I thought we were in this together." Skye asked as he finally got up off the shovel and started reaching for my hand.

"I can't keep running anymore Skye. I am going to turn my self in."

"What?! Why?!"

"Because Juliets death has awoken the monster I really am. I wont and I repeat I wont let you die for me I need to go on on my own." I paused " I would rather be dead if it made sure you were safe.' I wispered the last part.

" I wont leave you Renee." He said he put both of his hand on ethier sides of my face.

" Give me a reason to believe that you wont die." I snapped at him.

"Yu don't believe in me don't you." He said as he took a step back from me.

"Please don't say that."

"You think I am not strong enought to handel this kind of thing. Well ReneeI have seen many thing in my life but never death and I will admite I was really scared at frist but look I am still here." He barked.

  I just looked down and told him my final answere " You can't stay and that is final you may take the car with you." I took a deep breath trying to hold back the tears.

"No." He said firmly. 

He would never understand. 

"You will leave even if I have to drag you back myself."

 "No." he said.

"Please."

"No." I was startiing to get angry.I was boiling with rage I wanted to wolf up and rip off his head and tare his body apart.

"Dont' you get it." I said finally looking up and meeting his eyes." I don't want you here. I want you far away from me." I screamed. 

"But I love you don't you feel the same." He asked in a pained voice. But I needed him gone.

"Don't you get it. It was all a lie I just needed bait just in case vampieres came along and tried to kill me." I said holding back tears as best as I could.

"Thats un true. You saved me from your crazy ex remember." this pained me to much.

The words that came next stung like a bee to my heart " I did it so I could keep you as bait or-" I paused then started again"If I ever got really hugry I could just kill- " I gulped and then started again "You and then I could toss you away."

"No you wouldn't" he answered.

" I would. I'm a monster." I said.I felt him brush past me I herd the rawer of an engiean. I just curled up into a ball and stated to cry.

I really did have nothing.

I really was a monster.