What Happens When the Lights Go Out

Brooke's Thoughts: Entry Three

Brooke's Thoughts Entry Three:

Crimany you guys! I mean are some of you psychic or something! Seriously saying that Ryan and Jen already have kids. The nerve! She would so tell me if she got knocked up!

Okay so today I discovered the best new game ever. See how many mini paper balls you can get stuck in someone's hair. I was failing miserably until this kid with a massive afro sat in front of me. It was intense!

Afros are cool and all, but to a point. I mean this kid had some serious hair. I felt bad for him. Washing that mass! I bet you could get dread locks in it easily. That's another thing! Dreads confuse me. Dirty hair? Really? I mean I know there's like a clean way, but it's still matted hair. Correct me if I'm wrong. Sheeshcabob!

So anyways it's been like a week since I last talked to you guys. No movement from Ashton, but mucho from Ryan and Jen. He asked her again on a date, but this time he stepped up his game. He gave her a flower and a cookie saying 'Will You Go On A Date With Me?' I would've said yes just to get the cookie then dump his ass later, but she thought it was soooo sweet. I told you all, I'm so unromantic it's not even funny. I mean I seriously disappoint cupid in my bitchyness.

Okay well, I was listening to this song...I forget the name, but it was all about partying in a club, getting drunk and fucking someone. Classy song, no? Can anyone tell me what song that is? Oh, wait, no you can't because 75% of popular songs are about that same thing! It's kind of weird isn't it? I mean you have to wonder maybe those songs are like about the same people! Like one person found someone in a club wrote a song about them then that other person wrote a song too! So it's just like a circle of desperate people in a club! I've solved it!

That was completely beside the point I know. I just thought I'd enlighten your life a little. Okay so one time I was walking down the street and I saw a man smoking and a girl walked up to him and said, "You know that's really bad for you."

Then he's just an ass and tells her to get the fuck out of here. So then it's my turn. Because people were getting really annoyed with his smoking.

I walked up and am like, "Sir, do you know what's in your cigarette."

So he's like. "Good stuff."

So I'm like, "Oh really, I didn't know you were a fan of rat pee. Gross!"

"Rat pee is not in this."

"Is so!"

"Is not!"

"Is so! And so is rat poison and did you know that second hand smoke is deadlier than you smoking so you're murdering all these people here."

I was trying to be a good little person, but he was testing my patience. Mind you I was like eight when this happened.

Well, then he pulled the hay the broke the camel's back. He took a drag and blew it in my face.

"You butthead!" I hit him in the stomach took his cigarette and stepped on it. "You just took a couple months off a little eight year old's life! Happy about that?!"

He was still coughing after I hit him. I was eight, but I was a tough little thing. That's when my sister butted her big butt into things. "Brookelyn! Don't do that! I'm so sorry sir! She's got mental problems."

I stuck my tongue out at her. Then she grabbed my hand and dragged me away to go meet our dad.

Not the most interesting story, but it gives you an idea of what type of child I was. I filled my sister's shoes with peanut butter when I was five too because I got mad at her. That was a high point in my life I have to admit.

She wasn't as happy about it though. Neither were my parents.

But anyways this weekend Jen and Ryan are going out and Jen had the nerve to ask if I wanted to double date with Ashton. I just laughed at her and walked away. I don't want anything to do with Ashton. Some girls always say that, but then later are all secretly head over heels for him. Not me. I can't even see myself with him. I mean he probably doesn't even like the same things as me and that's what makes a relationship work! So until next time my lovely people who seem to really like reading about me. Well, so do you think I should kick Ashton in the nuts randomly or just simply trip him tomorrow? That's my question.