Forbidden: Leadership

Chapter 16

-NINFA'S P.O.V-

    It's been a few days. I guess I should be use to her not being here. That's terrible to say but it is just how it is.
     As I change Dakota, I almost get lost in her eyes. Though purple, they hold shards of rubies and that's keeping me closer to Valerie than I'm physically able to.
     I've gotten a system down. I make bottles in extra for tomorrow. I make sure her diaper stays clean. That she stays clean. And well fed. She eats fast, though.
    I've returned Joel and Luke to their place. So now I truly am alone other than our daughter. I mean, I do have Valerie communicate through mind whenever she's not busy.
     Currently, she said she was training an army. And that sounds fun. She could do it well.
    But I know and understand why. There are some souls that are far too sinister to be allowed into heaven. Some that won't repent their sins or whatever.
    Those spirits have been leaking into purgatory, finding small slips in between this realm and that realm. They're haunting, even killing. So she is making good progress in saving the world.
    I'm just waiting for her to come home to us. Waiting for our family to be together again. I just want to have my family back.
    My head feels slightly fuzzy. The connection between our mind feels stronger.
"You're awake? I thought you had laid down."
"No, Val. I gave her a nap."
"How are you feeling?"
"I'm just mentally down, otherwise I'm good."
"Don't be so down. Dakota doesn't like it."
"How are you feeling?"
"Constantly getting stabbed. Because idiots don't know how to handle a sword. Give then a gun and they have a bad aim. Give them a sword and they pretend they're samurai but actually aren't and don't know how to be a samurai."
"That seems like it would be annoying. I wish I could heal you."
"No, your protection has kept me well. I heal rather quickly once hurt."
"Guess I am good for something."
"I might not be there but don't you ever think like that again. You are my wife, my love and my everything. I'm restoring what is going on here so I can find a way back to you."
"I'm sorry. I just feel like every time something good happen, something bad happens to counter it."
    It's so strange but I feel her. I feel her hand caress my cheek. And I tear to it.
"My beautiful Ninfa. We will be together again soon. I'm searching, the council is searching. I'll be home soon."
    I feel tears fall to it all. It's not fast enough. I miss my wife. I miss before Lucifer fucked everything up. I miss it all. Only benefit to all of this hell was Dakota.
"Don't cry, my love."
"I'm trying. I promise, I'm trying. I'm just sick of things getting in the way of us."
"I know. It think of the bigger picture, Ninfa. Look at the beautiful angel in your arms. You're exactly where I wish I can be. To be there for her. But instead I'm trying to protect her from so far away and I just want to hold her. I'm here and I feel like a terrible parent."
     The pain to knowing she feels like a bad mother when she's not. She's doing more for Dakota than I am. Both working from different angles.
"You're not a bad parent, Val."
"A bad wife too."
"You can't ask me to stop being harsh on myself while you're doing similar actions."
    I feel her. I swear I do. I feel her. I feel her hand on my cheek.
"You're so far away..."
"I'm never far from your heart."
     I laugh to her, though I know she can't hear.
"Leave it to you to bring in the cliches of words."
"Hey, I'm trying. My fail made you laugh, that's good enough for me."
    Dakota just watches me oddly. She knows I'm in contact with Valerie. She knows I am. Maybe she's just giving another image.
"You're so beautiful."
"And Dakota is magical."
"Very."
    I lay next to Dakota. Her eyes keep locked with mine. I see so much of Valerie in her but she looks like both of us.
    Valerie seems to have gone silent. Or has become busy again. And I'm left with my own mind.
"How come you don't share with me as you do her?"
    Something in her purple eyes flicker a blue. A teal color like mine. It's like she's reactive in her own ways to each of us.
   She's such a beautiful baby but I'm worried about the growth. Angels and demons grow at different paces. It might be just one if those things we go along with. And if it's like human growing.. I don't look forward to the teen years where everything enhances and they'll hit full power.
"Do you want to know a story?"
    Something in her eyes flash and it's as if she's telling me to continue. Or I really am going out of my mind. Probably going crazy but I tell her a story.
"Years don't seem long to us beings. So these 3 or so years have honestly felt like a blink of the eye. So much has happened though. I decided to help the world one day. Help with the war that our father's had caused. In the middle of a battle I was in trouble."
    I keep watching her eyes change. So odd yet keep me staring. Neither of us were expecting this but her eyes are purple and absolutely beautiful. Both of us.
"Stuck in the middle of a fight with limited options. I knew I wouldn't die right away from their attacks but I also knew I wouldn't get out of there. And then came this blur. This beautiful being, ruby eyes and a wicked sword. I had no clue who she was at first but she instantly had me interested."
   She keeps still. Looks as if she's actually listening. I continue this.
"Over time I fell. Over a short time, I fell in love. And I fell hard for Valerie. I can say I am still falling because I know I am. We've passed through so many dangers, protected each other, helped each other and saved many along the way. To this day, I regret very few things. But one will never be Valerie. I don't even care she missed our wedding."
    I somehow laugh that part out. It was terrible. It felt terrible... but with the way my life is going now... It doesn't hurt to laugh at it.
"She fixed it though. She's always found ways to fix the broken. Or make it even better than it was before."
    I sigh. "And then came you. Now, I don't regret you. Not for a second. But Valerie and I are stupid. Really stupid. So when I told her about you, things went completely upside down. But things were fixed again, made better even. And it wasn't much longer until you came. We were ready. And I had you. You make me so happy, though I know you can see my sadness. You're the reason I'm still hanging on, Dakota."
    I lightly brush my finger over her rights hand as she reaches for me.
"I know things are sad. But your mom will come back home. She promised us. She's just trapped for the time being. But she'll be here. And we will be waiting for her, won't we? We'll be waiting for the hero's return home."
    Something in her eyes flicker. I think it's sadness but I truly cannot tell. Her hand squeezes around my finger and I smile to it.
    It's like a rush. A rush of energy. Along with an image. She sent me an image?
    The image of the past. Where Valerie kisses my cheek. I think it had to have been when Dakota was born, I'm not for sure..
    I quickly wipe my tears. "Thank you, babygirl." The sight of my love brings me slight happiness in this sad world.
     Another image is sent, one of me when I was laughing. My smile.
"So this is what you do with mom?"
      I lean up and kiss her forehead. "We'll be alright, Dakota. She'll find a way back to us, we just have to wait."
    She starts to cry. I think she mimics how my heart feels. I quickly sit up and take her in my arms and rock her.
"Don't cry, babygirl. You've got to be strong too."
     I head over to the mini fridge and grab a bottle to put in the microwave. It takes small step of balance before I get it in the microwave and to the perfect temperature. I sit at the edge of our bed and begin feeding her.
    I honestly haven't ate. Not since Valerie made me and that was before the delivery. It's alright as long as I get enough rest, I don't care to spend a moment away from Dakota if she's my only physical tie to Valerie.
"Why do you eat so fast?"
      Her eyes just shine. The shards of ruby and drops of teal create an incredible amethyst. I could easily lose myself to them but I can't.
    I burp her for a moment before rocking her in my arms again. Her eyes close quickly and she begins to fall asleep. I rest her in the middle of the pillow fort again.
    I lay my head on one side and Misty climbs up and rests on her other side. I begin to fall asleep too. Fall asleep to this small little perfect creation. To Dakota.