Just sitting still
So cold and too numb to feel.
I sit and wait for something to happen.
I've made moves but got nowhere
Just sitting still listening to Eminem and NF
How could you leave us?
Still stuck in my head.
Just sitting still talking to the dead.
My nightmares fill my head with dread
I sit in the cold and think about what I could do.
I don't want to do some crazy shit.
I have a gun now pointed to my head.
All it takes is one bullet.
I have a razor blade but too afraid to use it...
I've asked for help but no one understands me.
Not the therapist
Not my parents
I've looked for answers
But god faded away
Now it's just me drifting away.
I'm drowning in sorrow for what I did.
I'm drowning in all the emotions that I keep in.
Every time I let go I burst in tears.
I'm vulnerable to attacks and I can't do this anymore.
I need help but no one listens.
I don't know how much time I have left.
I'm squeezing the trigger.
And counting down to 1
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
.........
It's over now I couldn't do it.
I don't know how to keep going.
My heart hurts
My thoughts killing me slowly
