I think I'm in love with him (Jacob Sartorius Fan-Fic)

Confessing

"So, How was school?" Jacob asks.

"Fine," I reply too quickly, staring at the ground.

Why does it have to be such a far walk home from to school? This is so awkward.

"Are you okay?" He questions.

"Jacob," I sigh.

"What? What's the matter?" He queries.

"I can't do this right now, I'm sorry," I apologize, running into the house, leaving him behind.

I run up the stairs and into my room, shutting the door. Oh my god. I probably look and sound so dramatic right now, but I really can't do this right now. I really just can't. Do I seriously like him? Do I?

"Star? Star open up," Jacob calls, knocking on the door.

I ignore him and remain silent, not moving.

"I'm coming in," he states opening the door.

I look at him and then back at the floor. Oh god, I already have butterflies in my stomach. He walks over to me and sits next to me on the bed.

"Please tell me what's wrong," he gently says, rubbing a hand on my back.

"I, I," I stutter.

I just can't seem to get the words out.

"Come on, you know you can trust me," He consoles.

You got this Star. I take a deep breath and try to prepare myself. This could go in many different ways.

"Jacob, I think I like you. No, I know I like you. And it's really time consuming because I have to think about everything I do or say around you. I don't really know what to do because I'm certain you don't like me back and of course, my fucking luck I fall- scratch that, I like a fuck boy. I mean honestly, out of all people I have to like you, the hot fuck boy. It's not like it's a bad thing- what am I saying, it is. I don't mean you're bad, just your habits. I mean, why do you have to be so god damn cute? Like your rosy cheeks, and your really good hair- although I didn't really like it when you had your hair parted in the middle, it kind of look like curtains or windshield wipers. Oh! Maybe I should call you curtain head? Or no maybe- what am I saying. Anyways, I like you and I don't know what's happening but it's making me go crazy," I ramble, out of breath.

Was that much? Nah, not at all. Not at all. I look over at Jacob and see him sitting there.

"Sorry, I knew I shouldn't have said that," I mumble, getting up.

"Wait," he abruptly says.

In this moment, right now, I am the happiest I have ever been. He's stopping me! Which means that he feels the same way. Oh god oh god, are we going to be boyfriend and girlfriend? Or or maybe-

"You have something in your teeth."

Oh.

Ok.

"Yea," I reply blankly, giving him a sad smile and walking out of the room.

I blew it. I said how I feel and I blew it. This proves that I should just keep everything bottled up and sealed away. Because when I say how I feel, it goes wrong, always always always.

****
"Hey Angelina," I smile.

"Hi," she smiles back.

"So, hows it going with Ethan?" I ask, wriggling my eyebrows up and down.

"I think okay, we have hung out a lot," she informs.

I nod and we continue walking.