Ange (girlxgirl)

Chapter Forty-eight

How I get through the day without breaking down, I will never know. Our song came in at number 28 and we were all so shocked and happy that for the five minutes it played, I forgot everything that happened this morning. I didn't feel myself, I feel as if a piece of me was missing and when we talk to Triple J, I had to make a conscious effort to I sound happy. I posed for pictures, talked to the guests and made sure I didn't cry. The only person who notices something is Katherine.

Everyone has left by 8, I climb the stairs, crying silently. I sit in the shower, letting the water try and wash away all the tears that just keep coming. I feel sick and weak. I get into my pyjamas, put on a sad record and lie on my bed, feeling as if I'm drying.

The door opens.

"Angelina, are you ok?" Katherine steps in and stands at the end of my bed. "Obviously not," she continues. "Someone is over here singing about heartbreak."

"I'm fine." I try to say, but I can't and I start to cry, ugly.

"Oh, Angie. What happened?" Katherine asks, she sits down beside me on my bed and places a hand on my head.

"She is just leaving," I whisper. "She is going and not coming back."

"Who? Natalie?" I had to give Katherine Nat's name because she wouldn't stop nagging me about my girlfriend and meeting her. Hearing her name now nearly breaks the heartstrings that hold my heart together. "She is going, moving. We broke it off, only because we couldn't see how it would work."

Katherine looks at me sympathetically. "It is hard to lose the first, we always think the first time we are in love will be forever."

"I don't want to lose her, not yet."

"We are never truely ready to lose someone. No matter who they are to you, there will always be something that bonds you to them."

"I never wanted to lose her." I sob hard into my pillow.

Katherine stroke my head. "It will all be ok in the end. It seems like the end of the world, it isn't though."

I fling my arms around Katherine and hug her, sobbing into her shoulder.

"It's ok." Katherine soothes while patting my back, I lie back down and Katherine gets up. "Everything will all be ok." Katherine says quietly before leaving my room.

I pull open my bedside table drawer and get my notepad and pen. I scribble down a few lines that get wet by tears, smudging the ink. I put down my book and lie there on my side, listening the last words that the vinyl has to say before spinning to a stop.