MY EX IS THE NEXT?[the bitter tale]

Shadows

"Timothy, ayoko na. This time I'm sure, don't waste your time for me anymore. I--- I need space, and I'll be needing it forever."

He looked at me. Nagsimula na din syang umiyak, and that broke my heart. Hindi ko sya kayang makitang ganyan. But I have to be strong. Ayoko nang magsayang ng oras sa kanya. Wala akong oras para sa mga laro mo Timothy. I can't even bear to withstand your acting, my dearest actor.

"You're acting, right? Umaarte ka lang para masaktan mo ako?"
He shook his head.
"Ofcourse, itatanggi mo. As expected."

"Hindi. I can never act at you, lahat ng 'to totoo."

I smiled at him.

"Paano kita paniniwalaan? You're an actor."

"No, please."
Unti-unti syang bumababa and I just realized what he was trying to do. He was kneeling down. I gasped.

"Anong ginagawa 'mo?"

Nilapitan ko sya.

"Tumayo ka nga dyan."

Nakatingin sya sa sahig, habang patuloy ang pag-agos ng luha nya. I can't bear to do this.
How can I let go of him if he was like this? Ano bang plano nya? Saksakin ako ng konsensya?

"I... I can't lose you."
"Look at me." Umiling sya. Still in tears.
"I said look at me."
He looked at me. Punong-puno ng luha ang mga mata nya-- at hindi ko kayang hindi punasan at pigilan ang pagpatak ng mga luha nya. He's making me weak.

"Please, don't leave me. I need you. Pangako---pangako magbabago na ako! And I will do everything para maniwala ka na hindi lang ito acting!"
I closed my eyes. Trying to hold back my tears, but I just can't

"Gusto kitang paniwalaan,pero hindi ko kaya."

Humahagulgol na ako, ang sakit. Bakit kailangan naming umabot sa ganito? Parang kahapon lang... Masayang masaya kaming dalawa.

"Kylene."
"Just---just leave me alone."

Hinawakan nya ang dalawa 'kong kamay.

"Hindi ba lahat ng tao deserve magka second chance? You taught me that!"

I smiled at him, itinuro ko sa kanya ang dibdib 'ko.

"This, this hurts whenever you... you are around. Gusto ko nang manahimik, please Timothy."

I sobbed.

"Just respect my decision. Tapusin na natin 'to."
Umiling sya.
"Hindi ko kaya. I'm sorry."

"Please? Tumayo kana. And leave the door silently."

"Sabihin mong hindi mo na ako mahal, aalis ako. Hinding hindi mo na ako makikita."

Kinilabutan ako sa sinabi nya. I don't love him anymore. I know that--but.. Akala ko naamin ko na sa sarili ko na mahal ko na sya? Everything's so complicated.

I looked at him, he was nervous as I. Waiting for my answer.
Hinila ko sya at niyakap.

"Okay, okay. I'll give you this chance."

I can't lose him. Two years, two long years. Napakahaba na nun para itago ko sa lahat ang nararamdaman ko para kay Timothy. Now everything's clear. Desidido na ako. I will follow my heart. I want him back.

"So... I'm all yours?"

Basag pa din ang boses nya. Mamahalin ulit kita Timothy. Sana hindi ako nagkamali sa desisyon ko ngayon. Pero syempre, that was all an imagination. Just some of my nasty,filthy,disgusting imagination. We're just starting by now. He slowly entered the room as I turn to him as well.