3:26 am

t w e n t y - f i v e

t w e n t y - f i v e

"Well, I guess this is... it," I said, smiling sadly up at Holden as we stood in the airport with each other. It seemed that Holden couldn't wait to leave considering he chose such an early flight. He was lucky that I cared enough about him to drive him to the airport at two-thirty in the morning.

As we stood there, I stayed silent as I looked up at the person I had recently completely fallen for. On the inside I was screaming at myself to just say something; anything would have been better than just standing there and letting him leave.

But I couldn't bring myself to tell him that I wanted him here, that I wanted him.

"I'll still bother you everyday," Holden promised, smiling down at me as he tried to make conversation. It was clear he wasn't the same sort of sad I was, he was seeing the best of things while I was only thinking of the worst. "I'll still be your favorite distraction... even when you become a hot journalist."

"Yeah, uh-huh, I bet you will," I told him before biting my lower lip, trying to restrain myself from saying anything else I might regret. It was clear Holden was trying to get me to cheer up, but I wish I could tell him why that wasn't going to work this time. Holden brought his hand up to back of his neck and sighed quietly as he stared down at me.

"I'm really glad I came to see you," he declared and while I was glad he had come, I also wished he hadn't come down here just to fuck me over. I had been completely content keeping my feelings suppressed while I wasn't forced to see him, but he messed all of that up. "Do you want me gone that badly?"

"I don't want you gone at all, jerk," I gave Holden a small smile, and it was clear he was happy with himself for clearing the frown off my face when his smiled widened. "I'm glad you came down, it's been really good to see you. You know I'm glad you visited."

"I know," Holden nodded and I slowly crossed my arms as I looked down, away from his stare. "I feel like this is worse than you running in here after me, yelling, the last time I took this flight."

It hurts just the same, I thought.

"C'mon, sweet pea, you look pitiful."

"Thanks," I said, rolling my eyes as I continued to look down. Holden sighed and took a step closer to me before lifting my chin. My heart began to pound as we stood so closely to each other, but as the seconds passed I knew that nothing was going to happen. My eyes flickered down to his lips for just a second, and as I looked back into his eyes, I hoped he hadn't noticed.

"I'll be back, I promise," Holden told me, but I didn't believe him. He might come back, but it wouldn't be for me. It would be for his parents to meet Andy, or anything but me. As we stood there, a voice came over the intercom, and we both took a deep breath in as we realized it was an announcement for his flight. "Quincy, I promise."

"Okay," I said, giving it my all to sound like I believed him, and that I was fine with what was happening. "I guess you need to go."

"You're breaking my heart," Holden whined and I scoffed quietly as I looked down again.

And you're breaking mine, I wanted to say.

Two strong arms wrapped around my small frame before anything else could happen, and I found myself sighing as I wrapped my arms around Holden as well. Holden's hold on me became tighter the longer we stayed there, and I squeezed my eyes shut as I tried to match the hug he was giving.