A Home For Zoe

Miserable (In Editing)

"I wanted to see them again,
to say goodbye the way that I wanted.
But if I got my way, I'd never say goodbye."

Zoe

Goodbyes have been the one constant in my life. Packing all of my stuff, moving again, is common place. The thing is I was beginning to think this time would be different. But it's not.

I stare down at my empty suitcase. Then around at my room. It looks like it belongs to someone. There are pictures on the wall and resting on the dresser. There are clothes in the closet, more than double what I had when I first got to the Bradley's.

The stuffed dolphin I won at the fair last month rests on my bed. I sit down and pick it up. I can almost hear Chloe laughing as I tried to climb the ladder. The twins cheering as I got close to the top. I wrap my arms around the toy and bury my face in it, wiping away the tears I had let escape.

My hands shake as I start folding thing to place in the suitcase. My expertise shows when I fit almost all of my things in. At the top of my second bag I place the framed picture of the whole family taken on my birthday.

I swing one bag over my shoulder and pick up the other one, carrying them both downstairs.

Everyone is gathered at the bottom of the stairs. Alanna gives me a watery smile, "I wish you'd let me help."

I shake my head, "It's OK, I'm great at packing." I've had plenty of practice, I add in my head.

"This time's different," Alanna says, "You know that don't you."

"Yeah, I know." It's all they've been saying the past week. How they're going to fight this. How I'll be back home soon.

But I'm used to promises being broken. I know they'll try for a while, but they'll give up. People are great at giving up on me.

I hear a car pulling into the driveway. It's Mrs. Anderson, and she here to take me to my father's house. When Alanna opens the door, Mrs. Anderson gives me a sympathetic smile. I know she had no control over this, but I'm still mad at her.

I'm mad at the whole world, really. It's like I'm cursed. The moment I actually start to be happy, life swoops in to destroy everything.

"You ready to go, Zoe?" Asks Mrs. Anderson.

"Yeah, I guess." I turn the family. My family, in some other world, where I get a happy ending. "Bye," I mumble.

Alanna hugs me first, "I love you," She whispers in my ear.

"I love you, too." I gulp back the flood of tears.

"Be good. We'll see you soon," says Bridger when it's his turn to hug me. I bury my face in his chest and pray he's right.

Cason tells me, "Family is forever, a little separation can't change that."

"I wish you didn't have to go." Chloe whispers in my ear.

"Me too." I say back.

I turn to Tyler and ruffle his hair. "Take care of your sisters, OK?"

He wraps his arms around my waist, "Come back soon."

When it's the twins turn, Peyton clings to my leg. Hannah asks, "Who's going to play princess with us now?"

I kiss her head, "Chloe will, until I get back." I don't tell I don't think I'll be back.

I pull away and pick up my bags, following Mrs. Anderson to her car. When I turn to look out the back window, they're all there, standing on the front porch, waving goodbye. I wave back because whatever they say this is goodbye.