Sincerely, Sara

Chapter 19

Three days later I was allowed to leave the hospital.

In those three days I was surprised every morning to wake up. Kyle visited me almost every day. He was home schooled... Or hospital schooled I guess. He had to go through surgery's for his eyes so often he just stayed. 

The only thing we could do really was watch TV or play scrabble, which i always won. We could have gone out the courtyard or wandered the halls but I would have to drag along all of the monitors that were hooked up to nearly every part of my body. 

Day by day I had less and less machines hooked up to me and more and more chance of not seeing the next morning.

I became paranoid, and my parents became concerned. Every little pain I felt I would burst into tears. Not because I was actually hurting, but because I thought I was dying.

My mental state deteriorated quickly from there. My parents had decided to send me back to chemo. I put up quite the struggle when they tried to get me into that room. I only listened when my mother started sobbing.

I didn't want to hurt her. I didn't want to go back, but hurting her was worse, seeing she was already being hurt enough. By my doing.

I started sleeping often. I guess my friends had come to see me, I hadn't noticed. They knew something was wrong with me. My parents told them my migraine medication had caused me to go a little crazy.

I was better now though. The chemo helped I guess. Gave a little more assurance that I was being treated and getting better.

The doctors tried to convince me to get the surgery but I refused. I wanted to remember everything in my life. And the surgery wasn't even guaranteed to work. Why take the chance?

I was going back to school today. I had already gone over in my head what I would tell my friends. I had a really bad migraine, so they put me on medication. The medication had made me go nuts. They recently switched my medication so I was going to be normal-ish now.

I wanted to see my friends and be normal, but I wasn't sure how long I could stay normal. Not without them knowing about my cancer. Knowing about the Grimm Reaper knocking on my doorstep.