Pushed

Chapter 13

By early evening Brandon left for Matts house and Lena went to drop Jesus at the beach and Jude at Conner's. This left Stef alone with the girls. She didn't know what to do. I was almost dinner time but none of the boys were gonna be there. Lena had told her that Callie had only eaten half a tub of strawberry yogurt the night before and the balance for breakfast this morning, her lunch hadn't been much more. Stef was starting to worry, Callie was loosing weight and her clothes were starting to look too big on her, she was pale and tired easily and Stef had noticed her stop for a moment each time she stood up indicating that she was blacking out frequently. She knew that she needed to discuss these things with Lena and they needed to make a decision but she was so afraid that Lena would downplay the seriousness like she'd been doing all this time. Stef was leaving the kids' laundry on their beds and she left the girls' for last. She knocked before entering their room to find them both sitting on Callie's bed. Mariana was quizzing her on everything Brandon had taught her. Callie was determined to do well through all this because apart from everything else she couldn't bare to be left behind. She was desperate to go back to school and just be normal again. Stef watched the two for a moment as she placed both sets of clothes on Mariana's bed. They seemed like they had bonded - both of them working together. Suddenly Stef thought that maybe she could use that to help her. She had dismissed the idea of using Jude, but maybe getting help from Mariana wouldn't be such a bad thing. "Honey I think I left your dress on my bed wanna come with me and get it?" Stef asked Mariana. "Sure." Mariana said as she got up. "Be right back Callie. The moment they entered the master bedroom Mariana turned curiously to Stef - the bed was empty. Stef smiled at her. "I need a favor." Mariana looked skeptical. Somehow she knew it had something to do with Callie. "How can I help?" She asked cautiously. "Take her downstairs and get her to eat something." Stef said. "Maybe with just the two of you it won't be so hard for her." Mariana could hear the desperation in Stef's voice even though Stef was trying to hide it. She realized that this was getting more serious than she had thought, Stef rarely got this anxious and the last time had been when she had informed her that Jesus might have been with Ana at her house. Was Callie really in that much danger? She wondered. "I'll do my best." Mariana said and Stef gave her a grateful smile. When Mariana reentered her room empty handed Callie questioned her. "Where's the dress?" She asked. "Um..." Mariana was silent for a little too long trying to come up with an excuse. "What?" Callie asked, knowing that there was no dress. "I'm hungry." Mariana said hoping to change the subject and get Callie to go downstairs with her. Callie looked away from Mariana. She got it - Stef had asked Mariana to get her to eat. 'Great, now one more person was gonna be after her' she though. Mariana caught Callie's look and went to sit by her. "They're really worried you know." She said softly. "Mom's not usually this panicked about anything." Callie felt a little guilty at Mariana's statement. As much as she wanted these reactions from her mom's she still felt bad about it. "We all are." Mariana added. "Even Jude." She hoped that Callie would help them out for him at least. It worked because at the mention of his name Callie's head snapped up. "What did he say?" She asked worriedly. "He just wanted to know what was going on with you." Mariana said. "And what did you say?" Callie asked. "Just that you weren't feeling well." Mariana lied. She didn't want to upset Callie even further and have her stop eating completely. Callie relaxed at her answer. She didn't know how she could handle things if Jude know what she'd been up to. Everything she'd ever done her entire life had been to protect him and even when she'd failed she'd still tried and she'd be damned if she stopped now. "Look it's just you and me right now okay." Mariana encouraged softly. "Mom isn't coming with us so you don't have to worry. Let's just go downstairs and eat something, anything you want." She said. "But you gotta eat something." She added, a little desperation evident in her voice. "Fine." Callie resigned. If she had to do this maybe it would be easier to do it with Mariana rather than anyone else. The two headed downstairs to the kitchen and Mariana pulled out the makings of a ham and cheese sandwich. She quickly made two and poured two glasses of orange juice. "One for you and one for me." She smiled as she set one plate and glass in front of Callie and the other in front of herself. Stef had seen the girls head downstairs and waited five minutes before she peaked her head into the kitchen and saw both girls at the table, sandwiches in hand. She smiled to herself in relief - at least today Callie ate something substantial. Stef was sitting on the steps out of sight but not out of earshot listening to her girls talk about nothing in particular when she heard the front door open - Lena was home. Lena opened the door and saw Stef sitting halfway up the stairs, a grin on her face. "What are you smiling about?" She asked. Not that she wasn't glad to see it. She had missed it in the last twenty-four hours. Stef motioned for Lena to be quiet and lead them both to the living room where they peaked in on the girls. Both their sandwiches were considerably smaller and Stef felt Lena relax by her side just as she had a few moments ago. The two headed upstairs quietly. Both with large grins on their faces. "She's eating." Lena exclaimed. "Mariana's a miracle worker." Stef said as she plopped down on the bed, her body more relaxed than Lena had seen in days. Lena sat down next to her wife, closer than she normally would. She needed to feel Stef close and unlike the last time, this time it was purely platonic - she just needed Stef to stop being mad at her. They rarely fought and even more rarely let it go on for so long. It's not that they didn't have their differences in opinion on a regular basis but they were usually able to listen to each other and consider each point of view before coming up with a compromise. But this time, apart from the difference of opinion there was also the stress and tension that had both of them on edge. Lena leaned in further when she finally felt Stef's arm wrap around her shoulder. This is all she wanted and she felt like she could stay this way forever - curled up next to the love of her life.
Dinner that night had been an easy affair with only the four girls in the house and the fact that Callie had already eaten an entire sandwich. Stef just gave her a tub of yogurt and left her with no instructions. After dinner the girls headed upstairs and Stef and Lena went to call Sarah. Callie waited anxiously for her verdict on whether or not she could resume school. It was all she could think about even though Mariana was trying to distract her by talking about clothes - not really something that would help though. Jesus and Jude turned up before Stef got off the phone and all the noise and bustle of their arrival did help distract her a little. "Hey bud." Callie said as Jude headed upstairs. "How was Conner's?" She asked. "Fine." Jude shrugged and headed into his room. Callie instantly knew that something was wrong. "Hey," She entered his room with Mariana close behind. "Did something happen with Connor?" "Yeah." Jude said, taking the excuse she was offering him. The truth was that he was mad at her. "What happened?" Callie enquired. "Nothing." Jude said. Mariana could see the hurt in Jude's eyes and so she helped him out a little. "Did you guys finally agree on an idea?" She asked, more a suggestion than a question. "Yeah." Jude took the offer. "Conner thought my idea wasn't good." Callie took the explanation easily. She had no reason to believe anything else and really she was still too focused on Stef's conversation with Sarah. "Don't worry about it baby." She said kindly. "You'll figure it out." Ten minutes later Stef and Lena walked into the girl's room and Mariana took that as a sign that she needed to find something else to do. "I'll be downstairs." She said as she hurried out of the room. The moms waited for her to go before turning their attention to a rather impatient Callie. "So?" Callie asked. "So..." Stef began. "You can go to school." She said and Callie smiled - an actual, genuine smile. "But..." Stef added and watched that gorgeous smile fade slightly. "There are going to be some ground rules." "O-kay." Callie said cautiously, not really sure what was to come. "You go from one class to the next with no exceptions. Your teachers will be keeping tabs on you which means no bathroom brakes or hall passes and you need to check in with Lena during recess and lunch and right after school." Stef listed.
"Okay." Callie answered. It didn't seem so bad. "There's one more thing." Stef said. "the checks are going to be done daily." All three of them knew that this wasn't exactly something that Callie would just accept. "No." Callie said miserably. "I promise I won't do anything." Stef thought for a moment about how to answer but Lena came up with one first. "Honey, we know that you are trying, we can see it but we also know how hard it is to stay strong sometimes. It's not that we don't trust you but we also want to make sure that you are safe and if us checking you helps you even in the slightest way to say 'no' when that feeling creeps back then that's what we're going to do." Stef was pretty impressed with Lena's answer. She always knew what to say to troubled teenagers and Stef admired her for it. "Fine." Callie resigned, knowing that there was no way she'd get out of this one. "We also have your next appointment at five tomorrow so after dropping the others home and washing up after school we need to head out again. The next morning Callie woke up early. She hadn't really slept much to begin with and heard Stef come into the room several times but pretended to be asleep each time. The truth was that she was a little nervous about going to school. She was already the freaky foster kid from juvie and now she wasn't sure what the kids at school thought about her absence and having the teachers babying her all day would definitely not help matters. But at least this was another step towards freedom - and that's what Callie wanted most. Stef hardly slept either and checked up on Callie several times. She had a feeling that Callie wasn't sleeping well either but as long as she was safe she'd give her the space she wanted. The whole family was dressed and ready to leave by a quarter to eight. Lena and the kids were heading to school and Stef was going back to work. She'd be working the eight to four shift so that she'd be home when Lena got home with the kids. She was so thankful that her job gave her the freedom to swap shifts pretty easily. Right before they all headed out for the day Stef and Lena pulled Callie aside. "I know, I know." Callie said as Stef lead her into the living room. "Don't go anywhere alone and check in with Lena." Callie had heard it already. "Yes." Stef said. "But that's not what we were going to say. We wanted to remind you that we love you very much and if you need anything at all you just need to call me or mama. Don't be afraid, we're here for you." Callie was a little taken aback by Stef's words. She was expecting a lecture but instead she was reminded that she was loved and had people to help her. The words made her feel both happy and sad at the same time - she finally had people in her corner, something she'd wanted for years but now that she had them she wasn't sure how to accept them. She wondered if she'd ever get over this struggle. When would it end? When she got better? When she finally got adopted? Would there ever be an end? Callie gave Stef a nod to say that she understood before heading out to the car with everyone else to start a day that could be one of the best in a while or just as easily be the worst.