Collide With the Flair of Selfish Machines

I

(Y/N)'s POV

High school always is a regrettable time. No matter what you do it's all wrong, even if while you're doing it, it seems right. There's a chance that you could've been the biggest douche or the biggest loser without knowing it until it was too late. Hell, it's not like it matters.

I was always lonely in high school, then again, who isn't. Even those popular bitches had their own enemies. High school is a time to make mistakes and I sure as hell made the biggest one...falling in love with Victor Vincent Fuentes. It just made things worse at home with the domestic violence and eating disorder I had. I can remember how it all fucking started.

Great, here's a flashback.

"You coming tonight?" Vic asked me as we sat in English together.

"For what?" I glanced up from my work.

"We're throwing a party tonight." Vic told me his plans for this weekend.

"Is your asshole brother going to be there?" I joked, gripping my side and feeling bone.

"You're just jealous he was homecoming king and you weren't the queen!" He rolled his eyes.

"Psh, yeah right." I scoffed and looked around nervously.

"Don't act like you don't like him, you're always over my house anyways." Vic joked.

"Don't flatter your brother." I laughed. He blushed hard through his tan skin.

"Trust me, I have no ability to flatter him. You're right about him." He shook his head. "Mike is a jerk. I think I hate him." He laughed.

"So your party tonight..." I got back on the subject.

"Yeah, are you down?" He smiled, flipping his awkward short hair.

"Most definitely, even if Mike will be there." I smiled sweetly. "You're brother's just a weird kid."

"I agree and you don't even live with him." He continued working on his class work.

AT THE PARTY

Vic and Mike knew how to throw a party. There was booze and dope along with horny teenagers dancing on each other...hence why I skip high school dances.

"Wanna' dance?" Vic shouted at me as he approached me for the first time that night.

"Nah, I don't dance." I gripped my solo cup that had my name on it in Sharpie.

"Don't be mean." He plead. I shook my head violently and took a sip of my alcohol.

"Hey, (Y/N)? Vic flirting up with you, I see." Mike came up and began joking with his stupid blonde hair.

"Mike." Vic hissed through his teeth.

"What? It's the truth, he has the hots for you." Mike winked at me. I had enough of these games, it was toying with my emotions for my best friend.

"I'm leaving." I decided. I couldn't go home because I knew my father would probably be drunk and thrashing things around.

As I exited the Fuentes' backyard I looked around. There were groups of kids holding red solo cups and laughing, a circle of smokers passing a joint, tripping kids jumping in the pool, and couples lined up on the fence and holding each other up as hickies planted on each of their necks. I grimaced, this is what high school is...a bunch of kids who think they're adults. It makes me sick, even though I participate. I mean...I just drink and smoke...I'm too afraid of men to let one lay a hand on me sexually. No thanks to my father.

"(Y/N), wait, please." Vic gently grabbed my shoulder and pulled me back to face him. Tears streaming down my face.

"Vic, no. I can't, you know why." I wiped away my tears.

"I just wanted one dance with you." He said softly, eyes wide and concerned.

"Vic...I..." I bowed my head to hide my emotions.

"Please, just right here on the side of the house where no one will see." He smiled sweetly, placing his hands on my waist. "A slow dance."

"I...I guess." I blushed vibrantly.

We started awkwardly rocking back and forth to what I called silence. I pay no attention to horrible house and rap music. That's the only shit kids listen to. It's all about sex and drugs, never true, meaningful lyrics. All I could do was think of my favorite song. My head was planted on his shoulder as he rested his head on mine, his hands gently rubbing my sides. I knew this was just to make me feel better, but he was still toying with my emotions.

"This is so melodramatic. It turns me on." Vic giggled softly.

"I'm sorry, but I don't do that. I'm a virgin." I whispered.

"(Y/N), give me a break here. I'm not that shallow." He pulled away slightly so we were face to face.

"I'm sure you get your share of girls anyways." I rolled my eyes and smiled crookedly.

"Um..." He looked at the ground and blushed.

"Something wrong?" I cocked my head.

"I've been saving myself." He mumbled.

"What do you mean?" I wondered, panicking slightly.

"Ever since freshman year when we first met, I kinda' liked you because over the time of our friendship I realized that nothing ever mattered without you. It was always dull. I've always been a virgin, even though I've had my share of...bitches." He giggled, his voice cracking lightly. "I wanted to give myself to you."

"Vic." I bit my cheek.

"I'm sorry." He laughed and shook his head as we stopped rocking.

"No, no, as much as I don't believe you, it's sweet." I smiled with my mouth closed.

"What do you say? Would you want to...be with me?" He nervously asked.

"Whoa." I squeezed my lips together. "I-I don't know." I sighed.

"I know. I'm convinced we don't make sense." Vic started. "I know your life at home and it hurts knowing I can't do anything about it, but if I could I'd kill anyone that'd try to get close to you." He promised.

"I guess it wouldn't hurt." I smiled shyly.

"Can I?" He looked me in the eyes.

"What?" I whispered, nervous.

"Kiss you?" Vic finished his sentence. I nodded slowly, scared.

Vic placed a gentle hand on the side of my face. His eyes looked soft in the moonlight as he bit his bottom lip and looked at mine. He slowly leaned down to me and I squeezed my eyes shut. I've never kissed a boy before and I was scared of fucking up. Vic's lips met mine passionately. His upper lip connected with my bottom one and they moved in sync as I held a pained expression on my face. His hands moved to my back and pulled me tight to his body as I squished my hands against his chest and pushed away slightly. He released me.

"S-sorry." He wiped his mouth. "I know about your past and that was brave of you." He said quietly. "I'll walk you home." Vic grabbed my hand gently as I sighed and looked at the ground.

This was the beginning of a wild ride of love and hate.