White Candle: A Colin Kaepernick Fan- Fiction

Ch. 14 Love and War

Colin played in Ava’s hair as she sat in his lap. She was in her music room and playing her piano. Carson was off with Ava’s mom, so the two had the house to themselves, and Colin planned to use every room if Ava would let him. 

“Stop goof ball,” she said as she felt Colin’s hand trail up her thigh.

Since they had planned on staying in today, and Carson wasn’t home, she was practically naked in Colin’s tank top and a pair of panties.

“When the kid is away, the parents will play.”

Ava stopped playing and stood up ready to leave the room.

“What did I do?”

“Nothing, it’s just…,” Ava trailed off.

Colin watched her carefully, but didn’t know what to say to her. After the two had been standing a few feet away from each other for nearly five minutes, Ava finally spoke up.

“I don’t want another baby-”

Colin felt like his world was falling apart and he before he knew what was really happening he was flying of the handle.

 “Why don’t you want another baby with me, Ava hmm?”

When she opened her mouth to answer him, he put his hand up to stop her.

“I know that things between us have been a little rocky as of late, but to say that you don’t want anymore kids with me is a bit extreme.”

Once again when she opened her mouth to speak, Colin silenced her.

“I just don’t understand Ava, you know how bad I want a big family just like I did.”

“Colin, your parents have three children, that’s hardly big.”

He felt his temper slowly rising and wanted to leave before he did something to extreme. Walking down the steps he slammed the door shut behind him and got into his car, driving nowhere in particular.

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Ava sat down in Carson’s room and picked up his pillow. She hadn’t excepted Colin to act the way that he did and she kind of wished that she didn’t say anything to him at all. She didn’t understand how two people that loved each other so much could stay at one another’s throat. Wiping away a few stray tears she stood up and walked around her son’s room. The truth behind the matter of her not wanting any more children right now, was she was just a wee bit selfish and didn’t want another baby to come between the empire that she was currently building. But the other part of her didn’t want anymore children because she knew that she wouldn’t be able to carry full term. It was a miracle that Carson was born healthy. To her having one healthy child was enough, and she thought it would be enough for Colin too. Realizing that she would have to come clean to Colin about how she was feeling, she walked out of Carson’s room and headed down to their living room and would wait for him to come so they could talk about this.

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Colin sat at the bar and downed his fourth shot of Vodka. He didn’t know what Ava’s problem was with having his second child. Deciding that the vodka wasn’t enough for him he ordered something a little stronger and thanked the bartender when she brought him a glass of Henny.

“Colin,” he heard someone call his name.

He wasn’t drunk enough to have a hangover in the morning but he was slightly buzzed. Turning around he saw Anquan walking up to sit beside him.

“Ava called me and told me what happened.”

“And?”

“Why did you go off on her like that man?”

“She doesn’t want to have anymore of my kids, do you know how bad that hurts man?”

“But did you let her explain why she didn’t want anymore kids?”

Anquan knew that every story had two sides, but something in his gut was telling him Ava had the facts right and was just waiting on Colin to tell him he was right.

“No,” he said taking a sip of his drink.

“And why didn’t you?”

“I don’t know man, she just knows how to push my buttons, and vice versa.”

Anquan took the drink from Colin and stood him up.

“I’m taking you home to your wife and you will listen to everything that she has to tell you.”

“Fine, but can you tell me why she called you?”

“She’s scared Colin and you snapping off  on her the way you did probably scared her even more.”

Colin looked at Anquan and knew that Ava had told him the reason behind this new argument.

“Tell me.”

“It’s not my place to.”

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It was 10:05 when Colin walked into the house. Ava breathed a sigh of relief and went over to hug him. When she felt his arms go around his waist she leaned into him more. 

“I was worried about you, where did you go?”

“I went to work out and then went to the bar.”

Ava arched her eyebrow at him.

“You were gone for the whole day.”

He shrugged his shoulders.

“I had a lot on my mind, where’s Carson?”

“He’s upstairs sleeping can we talk?”

Colin nodded his head and walked with his wife over to their couch.

“I don’t want anymore kids because I have a little bit of selfishness in me and I’m scared.”

“Of what?”

She looked down at her fingers. Colin knew what was coming next, her tears. 

“After Carson was born, I went to the doctor because I begin bleeding and crapping-”

“It was probably just your period Ava.”

She looked at him and he shut up to let her finish.

“That’s what I thought it was, but when the medicine didn’t help me I went to the doctor and asked him what was going on. After he ran a few test on me he told me that there was a slight chance that I would ever be able to carry a full term baby again.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Ava grabbed Colin’s hands and looked into his eyes. 

“Because I thought you would be angry and leave me. Please don’t leave me,” she cried.

“Baby I would never leave you I love you and to hell with what the doctors say. Do you want to have another baby with me?”

She nodded her head.

“Then we can still try, and as far as you wanting to have a career we don’t have to start trying right away. If it makes you feel better I’ll even wear condoms again.”

She kissed his lips and locked her hands around his neck.

“Whatever happens, happens.”

Colin smiled at her and bit her ear lobe before she laid her head in his lap. They were always in a war, but nothing could come between their love for one another.