I'm Low on Gas and You Need a Jacket

- chapter 13 -

Ashton's POV

He told me he loved me, but he is tired and probably didn't mean it. I stayed awake for most of that night. I lent over Luke to get his blades, oh how I missed them. But I can't. I can't break the promise I made Calum. I go over to the window and throw them outside.

I go back to bed and cuddle into Luke. Then, he starts panting and sweating.

"Luke!" I start to panic. "Luke wake up!"

I shake him around a bit before he sits up crying. He tries to get out of the bed and puts his hand on the bedside table, where the blades were.

"L-Luke," I whisper.

"I-I can't b-breathe," He says.

I go over and sit next to him rubbing his back.

"S-Shh, just breathe in and out."

He does what I told him. His breath was shaky at first, but then he started to breathe normally and I stopped rubbing his back. I pull him in for a hug instead. Oh how I wish he was mine. I wish I could kiss his soft rosy lips. Oh how I wish he was mine.

Luke's POV

Panic attack.

My second ever panic attack. I was now in Ashton's arms. He smells so good. I don't know why I left my blades out. They're gone now. I bet he took them.

I love him so much, but if I tell him I love him, he will get all grossed out by me, it would be the end of our friendship.

He pulled away and stared into my eyes. His eyes occasionally flickered down to my lips but then back up.

It was as though he was picking out every flaw I have, making me a bit uncomfortable.

But then, he started to lean in. He put his soft lips onto mine. At first I was stunned. Is the a dream? I start to kiss him back. I never wanted this to end.

Ashton's POV

Luke had just had a panic attack. We were both a bit shaky, but I pulled him out of the hug. I looked into his eyes, his beautiful eyes. I looked at his soft lips and thought how much I wanted to kiss them. I looked at every feature on his face. I should kiss him.

If I kiss him it may ruin everything.

I start to lean in anyway. Then my lips were on his. He's the most beautiful person I've ever seen. I love him so much. The kiss deepens as he starts to kiss me back. I soon pull away.

"I-I'm sorry," I say.

Luke's POV

"I-I'm sorry," he says.

Why did he pull away? Am I a bad kisser? Does he not like me in that way?

"A-Ashton-"

"I know, that was stupid. I'm sorry. It wont happen-"

I cut him off by putting my lips on his.

"Ash. I. Love. You. A lot," I say in between kisses.

He pulls away again. Oh god, he doesn't feel the same way.

"You what?"

"I-I love you, Ashton," I say shakily. At least he knows I meant it this time. Too bad he doesn't feel the same way about me.

"L-Luke," He pauses. Oh god, I'm a fucking idiot. "I love you too."

My eyes widen and I smile.

"You love me back?" I ask. He nods his head.

"Luke?"

"Yeah?"

"W-Will you be my boyfriend?" He asks. Oh my God.

I nod, then kiss his lips. "Of course I will."

I feel him smile into the kiss. After a minute or two we check the time to see that it was 3am.

We both fall asleep but this time,

it was in my boyfriends arms.

___________

aye lashton is together woo

guys... im 167 days clean, but i dont know if i can hold on for much longer. I even got out my blades today but i need someone to stop me

now pls dont call me an attention seeker bc i have no one/no where else to say this...

.

and on a happier note, my best friend keeps telling me he loves me & compliments me... he even said he ships our friendship omg. but if we like, dated, i think that would ruin our friendship + im awkward af