25. n i - j û - g o

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Five Months Later

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Five Months Later...

Dear Taehyung, 

These past couple of months haven't been the same without you. Though I desperately want you to join me...I don't want to force you into something you aren't ready for...

-

I crumpled up the letter in pure frustration tossing it into the garbage bin besides my desk along with three other failed attempts. Leaning back in my chair I massaged my temples trying to clear my head.

I didn't know what I was doing, even if I sent another letter to Taehyung, by the time he would receive it I was going to be long gone.

It was the end of the summer and today, more importantly, was my birthday. Tomorrow was my last day in Korea before Jinyoung and I jetted off to Los Angeles monday morning. 

The original plan was for Taehyung and I to finally start our lives anew in America once I turned eighteen, but things have changed since we made that promise.  

In the past months things have been difficult for Malia and I but with close friends around us we developed our own new family. A new light shined down on us, leaving us optomistic for the future. Everday was a blessing. It was just the other day when I checked into our bank accounts to see someone left behind twenty million dollars for both Malia and I, the charitable the donator went under the name of K.S.J

The Korean authorities seemed to have a strong hold for my mother when they sentenced her ten years for the countless drug offenses. We decided to cremate our father's body and had our own memorial by the sea as our way of saying goodbye. 

Then there was Taehyung....he'd been scheduled to be released from the Seoul Asylum tomorrow morning, Jimin planned to pick him up alone. In the span of five months, Taehyung and I have been in constant communication through letters. I tried to visit him a while back but denied entry since they weren't quite sure of his triggers but I snuck in not too long ago when they put him to sleep to test the hormonal balances in his brain. I sat with him for about ten minutes before getting caught. 

Two weeks ago I sent him a letter reminding him of our promise and future. I went as far to even buying him a plane ticket next to my seat and the address and pictures of an apartment I bought nearby the campus of UCLA. I had everything planned out. When the days passed by without any reply back from Taehyung I began to panic thinking I was moving too fast for him and maybe I should wait here for him to recover, but Taehyung wouldn't want me to wait. The whole situation conflicted me. 

"Saniyaaaa are you ready yet? Yoongi and Jooheon are in the car waiting" Malia knocked on the door coming inside my bedroom. She wore black tank that had a deep v cut tucked into black denim shorts with knee high boots and a diamond choker, overall she was a baddie. Me on the other hand wore a shimmery gold long sleeve romper with high heel gladiator sandals, I recently got jumbo box braids as I left them down.

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