Breaking The Mirror [Edited And Complete]

Shattered

The next day is Thursday. Seaton let me go home about thirty minutes after my school would've ended for me. He's being surprisingly... bland. His mouth usually stayed snaky and sharp, but now it remained closed. No insults. No yelling. No cursing.

No 'brat'.

No nothing.

I miss it.

When I get to our apartment, Alfred ignores me. I don't mind, really. I just pick up the food from the night before and I'm glad it's just pizza again. Pizza is easy to clean up, unlike Chinese, but since it's the food I ate with Seaton I can't bring myself to dislike it. I check under the table this time and everywhere else in the entire flat before I let myself go into my room and lie down.

I lie on my back, which feels better even now although slightly slick, and look up at the ceiling. Tomorrow I'll have to face Lauren – or rather, she'll face me – and I'll have to explain. I'll tell her I'm gay, because I believe what Suki said about that being the only way to get her to leave me be. Yeah, that's what I'll tell her...

But I'm not sure if it's a lie.

-

'Why'd you have to go and be so complicated? See the way you...'

That is the single most annoying song on the face of the planet, because it's fucking catchy and it gets stuck in your head. People got off of it a while ago, and now most people despise it.

I don't think Lauren got that memo.

She's listening to it as I approach her during lunch. I actually venture out into the courtyard just for her. She's sitting with a group of friends, and one of them just happens to be named Michael Cogan. Excellent. Just what I need. I'm already doubting my own sexuality, I don't need another person to help with it, thanks.

"What do you want, Norse?" Michael says to me with a saccharine grin on his square, flat face.

"I need to talk to Lauren," I reply evenly, looking at the redhead.

"Oh, so now you're interested?" She looks up at me skeptically, taking out those tiny earphones that are meant just for deafening you. She presses the button that turns off her MP3 player and turns her eyes on me, "Well?"

"Wait, Laur, you're interested in him?" Michael snarls, looking up at me. "He's gay, Lauren. Everyone knows that."

"Yeah, and everyone in the school has gaydar, hm?" Lauren rolls her eyes. Have they forgotten I'm here? It must seem weird, invisible me talking to a jock and a cheerleader. Did I mention Lauren's a cheerleader? I'm sure you could've guessed.

"Please, why'd he say he wasn't 'interested' then?" Michael tries, "Any straight guy would be interested in you."

Maybe I shouldn't have tried this...

"Okay, whatever," Lauren stands and grabs my hand, pulling me towards the doors, "I'll listen to you Jayden."

She leads me into the hall, and it's deserted like usual at lunchtime. When the door closes, I take a deep breath and she lets go of my hand. Thank whatever god in charge of hand-holding. She brushes a piece of fiery hair out of her eyes and looks at me expectantly. Maybe this isn't a good idea...what if she tells Michael? Well, he already seems to know, so...

"I am gay," I tell her, and she blinks.

"Really?"

No, I was lying because I really, really don't want to date you, "Yes."