Finding Christ

ANXIETY

This chapter isn't necessarily a devotional with bible verses and everything, but I felt like I should talk about this.

Life has been tough lately,
like really tough. 

I've had bad days and weeks that have turned into months. My anxiety is so bad that it had begun to unravel me as a person. I have a harder time connecting with people than I used to me. My social anxiety has sky rocketed in the most negative way possible so that I have an extremely difficult time talking to people - especially my peers.
In the last two years of me being home schooled again (I went back to public schooling freshman year), I have noticed that my anxiety has worsened. Like not subtly, but a lot. Because of the isolation that homeschooling can bring on, I have lost the normal social actions that most people have come naturally to them. It's hard. Next year, I will probably be going back into public school for this reason. My anxiety isn't a gradual nervousness, but instead, it's a gnawing fear in the back, front of my mind, in my chest that presses down and consumes me. 
This Thursday will be my 3rd therapy session. I have a therapist. 
These are really hard words for me to say. 

I hadn't really noticed depression creeping back in until I realized that I had begun to lose all my friends. See, I began to detach myself from them without really noticing it at first. I'm having a hard time figuring out who they're friends with. Who am I?

Through all of this everyday consuming, I know that God has a plan that is much greater than I will ever be able to comprehend. 

I can't quite see the light at the end of this tunnel..... but I know it's there.
I'm trying and I think that's most important. 
I'm trying to get better. 

Let's try together