Him: e.g.d

"Now You're Going to Leave Me Just Like Everyone Else Has"

I woke up hearing my brother's voice. Oh shit I fell asleep? I looked at the clock and it read 5:36 p.m.

Shit.

I walked towards the stairs, and I saw Luke and Ethan having a conversation. I stopped and stood at the top listening into their convo.

"It makes me sad when my mom and sis fight or yell." Luke said to Ethan.

"I love them both, but I don't like seeing my sister fight with my mom, because she's breaking in the inside too." He said.

Why is my heart crying?

A few tears fell down my face, but I quickly wiped them away and put on a smile.

"Hey buddy!" I said tickling his sides. He laughed loudly, making me actually smile.

"Hi Ethan." I slightly smiled, I feel like he's mad about how I acted towards him.

"Hey Tums, you okay?" He asked concern all over his face.

"Yes, why?" I asked, feeling something weird in my stomach as he said my nickname.

"Hey Luke, wanna go upstairs and play some games while your sister and I talk?" Ethan asked him. He nodded and ran upstairs happily. Well then.

"Tums what's wrong? And don't say "nothing"or "I'm fine", he said. I sighed and then it happened. I started crying like Niagara Falls.

"I'm such an idiot and I'm messing everything up." I sobbed, he hugged me and started rubbing my back.

"You're not an idiot, and you haven't messed anything up."

"But I am and I did, I went on a date with Ryan and found out Tyler was the one who set it all up, I fucked up my relationship with my mom, and now you're probably mad at me because of how I acted and I'm sorry about that. I didn't mean to and I-" I was cut off from Ethan.

"Tate, breathe," he lightly chuckled. I nodded and slowed down my breathing.

"I'm so done with life." I sighed.

"Don't say that ever." He said sternly.

"I was there once and I never want to go back." He said sadly. He was holding back, but I knew he had his own story to tell.

"How'd you get out of it?" I sniffled.

He started blushing as if he was embarrassed to say it. "From you, you helped me."

"How?" I questioned, with my eyebrows scrunched in confusion.

"Well um, you just trying to be my friend and always trying to talk to me, it made me feel like someone actually cared." His eyes started to water but no tears came out.

"You do have people who care for you; your mom, dad, brother-"

He cut me off again.

"Actually my dad died. He died from cancer, that was when I started to isolate myself from everyone. Even my own twin brother Grayson. Ever since then I started to not care about anything, I didn't care about people, myself too, I didn't care about school, how I dressed. Everything. That's when I started getting bullied. At first it wasn't that bad since it was just weird stares and people staying away from me."

He finally shared his story and he was finally letting emotion out. I payed attention to the story, some tears fell out.

"Then it started getting worse when Tyler and his group started pushing, shoving, and punching me, because they saw me as a weak, pathetic, loser."

"They were right though, I am a weak, pathetic, loser." I shook my head not believing it.

"Tate, yes I am I can't even fucking stand up for myself!" He laughed dryly.

"So I-I did something that I shouldn't have." Tears were streaming down his face.

Oh gosh, I hope he didn't do what I think he did. I closed my eyes tightly and shook my head, I didn't want to believe what I think he did.

I grabbed his hand, and pushed the sleeve up. There were several healed scars on his wrists. I ran my thumb over them and started to cry harder.

"I wish I didn't tell you this, because now you're going to leave me, just like everyone else has." he removed his hand from my grip and walked away.

-

I had a hard time sleeping from all the shit that happened. I got dressed and walked out the door, not saying bye to my mom.

I decided to get a ride from Gray like I normally do.

"Hey Gray, hey Ethan!" I said, smiling.

"Hey T!" Gray responded.

"Yeah, whatever." He mumbled looking out the window. Gray looked at me through the rear view mirror, and raised his eyebrow, I shrugged my shoulders, confused on why he was acting like this.

-

It was finally lunch and Ethan was isolating himself again like he did before.

"Hi, um can I sit here?" A girl asked, making me get rid of my thoughts. She was very pretty, she had black hair and green eyes.

"Uh sure." I said, offering a smile.

"Thanks! I'd normally be sitting with my friends, but they all ditched me." She said.

"Oh, well you can sit here anytime, I'm Tatum." I introduced myself.

"Oof, nice name! I'm Victoria!" She introduced.

I introduced her to Grayson and Dani. I didn't introduce Ethan to her because I was still upset from what happened.

"So, how old are you?" I asked her, trying to get to know her.

"I'm 18, you?" She asked.

"Oh, I'm 16." I answered.

We all started talking and laughing. She ended up being a cool person.

We all walked to our different classes. Gray and I headed to Forensic Science and we finished working on a crime scene we were doing.

I grabbed the stupid pass that we need to carry around when we go to the bathroom. As I was heading to the bathroom I saw Ethan walking my way.

I was about to say "hi" but I noticed he was soaking wet.

"Ethan why are you all wet?" I asked.

"Why do you care?" He scoffed, still walking to wherever he was going. Ouch.

That honestly hurts. I thought I finally broke through his built up walls and changed him, without realizing it. Instead he said fuck it and built them right back up, being the cold heartless person he was before. This time, I don't think I can help him, it hurt way too much to go through that again. I guess we weren't meant to be friends?
_______________
why did i make this fucking sad i'm-