it's just our thing | yoonmin

can't hold myself back

Jimin came to Yoongi's place around 11pm that night. None of them seemed to be worried about late hours at which they decided to meet. It wasn't a problem. In fact it was just giving the atmosphere an unique spark and increasing tension between them.

It was a little bit thrilling yet normal for them that Jimin had his head resting on Yoongi's arm while the other one was wrapping his arm around younger's neck and smooching it a little. It was such a nice feeling that they didn't want to stop it. Even if they knew how bad it looked.

And this is how it was this time too - two boys in each other's embrace, their bodies covered with a warm blanket, watching stupid reality shows. But nothing was important as long as they were together, that close with another person as never before.

Because that's how they felt - as they were in a special bubble separating them from the rest of the world.

But there was this one thing which was disrupting the peace of their hearts and making them beat a bit faster than always. Namely, they both hasn't considered them as a normal pair of friends anymore and there was no need to lie about it. Of course they didn't tell each other how they felt because they were simply scared. Scared because of their wrong feelings which couldn't see a daylight and scared to be rejected. Such a shame that they didn't realize what other one thought, because feelings were just making them blind.

At that moment they were thinking about the same thing and it seemed that Yoongi felt it, because he hugged younger tighter and covered his body even more with a blanket. Jimin smiled on this pleasant gesture and put his small hands around older's waist. Then he realized how bad it looked and suddenly pulled off feeling guilty "something's wrong?" calmly asked Yoongi surprised by younger's sudden move "no nothing, sorry i just remembered something" he looked down and hugged himself looking as he was dependent himself "Jimin, I know you're lying. Come on, what's wrong?" "forget it, it's nothing important"

Yoongi got really confused by Jimin's sudden actions. Even if other one was telling him that he's okay and nothing is wrong, he just couldn't believe it. They didn't have to know each other all life to know about themselves more than anyone else. That's why after few minutes Yoongi got up and turned the TV off making Jimin focus on him, but it seemed that he didn't want to.

Yoongi slowly came up to Jimin and sat down definitely too close to him. On of his hands grabbed younger's hand and the other one gently touched his chin, making Jimin look at him. They had just been looking into each other's eyes for a couple of minutes before Yoongi finally spoke "tell me what's wrong? I see that something is bothering you, let me help" Jimin sighed heavily and made an attempt to pull out his small and shaky hand from older's tight grip. Of course unsuccessfully, because he was much weaker than him.

Jimin really wanted to cry. This whole relationship was so harmful for him, he didn't even know why he was still seeing Yoongi, even if he promised to himself and Hoseok that he would kill these feelings. He couldn't hold it back anymore, it was burning his heart and lungs down, he wanted to shout it out. No matter how hard he tried, his organism fooled him and suddenly hit tears fell down to his cheek "jesus Jimin, you're worrying me" he wiped younger's tears leaving his hands there to hold his head "I just can't do this anymore, Yoongi..." he opened his swollen eyes and looked at Yoongi's face making the world stop for the moment again "So it's the perfect time to tell you tell you something..." they said in the same time "you first" again, they laughed awkwardly "no seriously, you first" said shyly Yoongi scratching his neck "ugh okay, so..." he loudly breathed in and out "I know it's wrong in our situation but...I really can't consider you just as a friend or i don't know, brother's fiance?" he stopped just to look into Yoongi's brightening eyes "I know you love Jaemin, I know it very well but I can't kill it, I think I may have some feelings for you. Just don't be mad at me please, we can forget about what I've just said and move on as normal friends and a family soon..." for a short moment which felt like infinity the room was filled with quiet and only their heartbeats could've been heard "wouldn't it made me a hypocrite then?" Yoongi finally spoke giving Jimin his most beautiful smile "wha..."

But he couldn't end because suddenly Yoongi's soft lips were placed on his and he felt as his heart was about to jump out of his chest. That was a thing they both were waiting for that long. At first Jimin was so shocked that he didn't move at all but few seconds later he found the right tempo and gave Yoongi the permission to continue this action by softly throwing his hands around older's neck and deepen the kiss full of exploding inside of them desire but also some kind of...pain.

Jaemin.

"We can't do this to Jaemin, he loves you" Jimin pulled out again looking away and biting his lips nervously

"But I don't love him and I can't hold myself back anymore"

"W-what? Why did you propose to him then?"

"Because meeting you made me realize that he's not the one whom I love"

Yoongi didn't even let Jimin answer to his unexpected confession because his lips were again placed on the ones he wanted that much, letting all worries blur in the desire and, despite every obstacles or doubts, pure happiness.