Our Time by meli2cm
Description:
Saya Himekawa, a quiet and shy girl. Never even once having friend in 16 years she lives. The other students in Kirin School called her the Lonely Princess.
She yearn to have a friend. But she is too scared.
Seiran Kagami, a lively and cheerful boy. everyone loves him as he is the most popular boy in school. Everyone try to be on his good side. But he isnt happy. He is tired to become like mirror that reflect what people want to see but not himself.
But this one girl. One of his classmate that always gaze at the window and never talk to him.
What happen when both of them meet and one of them start to fall for the other?? The story of mirror prince and lonely princess....
My review:
✔Story Plot
It's just like a cliché anime, a quiet girl meets a popular yet outgoing guy and instantly, her life turns upside down although this does have a twist on how the guy gets close to the girl.
✔Story Description
The description is okay although it is kind of long.
✔Cover
It's so beautiful, the way it was made. No complaints about it♡
✗Criticism
Well, here are some parts whereby I felt it was badly written.
In Chapter 3, I felt as if you had written her off character. Imagine a super shy girl who has never speak out her feelings once in her life suddenly follows a cheerful guy and even runs with him and have fun. Isn't the progress too fast for a girl who has never even spoken much to progress so fast?
On the other hand, I have quoted from chapter 5 to show you the mistakes.
"A boy broke into the tower. He told her to hide her from some witches that chase her. The confuse princess let her hide her inside the tower, she even helped to trick the witches."
Firstly, your sentence structure is wrong. You should research and use different connecter words. Not only will it make your story seem more interesting with the twist of words, but the sentences will feel neater. The next thing to take note of is your grammar and spelling errors. There are plenty of them so be sure to edit after you finish a chapter!
♤Ratings : ★★★★☆
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