Innocence

Chapter 44

I sat on Jax's body as I sobbed on his shoulder.

My body shook from fear of never being rescued, and the memories of what happened.

All the humor I used to have...was near to being gone. I keep getting hurt.

What have I done to deserve what had been given to me?

I wonder if the world would be a better place without me.

Happier people, less crimes...less rapists.

The thought of me not being in this world captured my mind for a minute.

All this hurt...it can stop.

I can stop hurting.

I slowly lifted my head.

I looked around the taxi car.

If I wasn't here, they wouldn't have had to come this far to save me.

They wouldn't be so worried.

They could be happily living their lives without me.

I'm a burden.

My sobbing stopped as silent tears trailed down my face.

If Jax would've never met me...he would be happy. He wouldn't have to worry about me anymore.

He wouldnt have to waste his time.

I turned my head back to Jax.

I stared at his chest. I couldn't bear to look in his eyes when I was about to ask him such a question.

"Jax?" I asked softly. Almost so softly, I didn't hear it.

I felt Jax's gaze set on me.

"Would..would the world be a...better place without me?" I asked slowly and calmly.

I felt Jax tense underneath me.

"What do you mean?" He asked gruffily.

"Do you think..it would be better..if I wasn't here?" I asked closing my eyes.

I suddenly felt everyone's gaze on me and Jax.

Jax gently gripped my arms and stared into my eyes, as I continued to stare at his chest.

"Princess, look at me." He said softly.

I shook my head.

I couldn't. If I looked at him, I would feel so selfish for thinking about not being here. I already did enough pain to him.

"Why not?" He asked.

"I've done enough pain, Jax. And now, I'm being selfish...and causing you more pain. I want to stop hurting. I-I want people to stop hurting because of me. I want things to stop hurting." I said as I looked up at him.

Jax paused as he looked into my eyes.

"Princess. The only pain you're causing me...is the way you see yourself. You are beautiful. You are perfect. Princess..you're a goddamn piece of treasure. You deserve the best. You deserve way more than me. You don't hurt me. And no. I don't think the world would be better without you. Because I need you Brooklyn. If you weren't here, I would still be in my old state. Cruel...harmful..but you...you showed me how to change-for the better. Baby, please don't ever think the world would be better without you. Shit is gonna happen, and some...worse than others. But I will try my best to try and stop whatever comes to even threaten to hurt you. I can't stop everything Princess. But I promise that I wont stop trying until the day I die. All these people that hurt you will get what's coming to them. Most likely, from me. Please keep your head up. I really, really like you Brooklyn. If you left...I...I don't even want to think about that. It makes my stomach twist and turn. Please. If you won't try for yourself...try for me." He grabbed my hand and gently held it as he spoke to me. He didn't once move his eyes from mine.

I look down at him and my eyes are watering again.

I nodded slowly, and my heart warmed.

"I-I really like you too Jax." I stated. When I confessed, it felt like a weight had been lifted up off of my chest.

Jax's eyes widened a little.

"Wait...really? You like me?" He asked frantically.

I looked at him and nodded.

I would have smiled, I just...couldn't at the moment.

Jax smiled and gave me a gentle hug.

"Don't worry Princess. You're mine. I will make you better. I will make you feel like a Princess. No one will dare to touch you. Anyone who even tries to come near you, will die. I promise you will be treated the best. I like you so much, and I wouldn't want to destroy that by being stupid. You're mine now." Jax said as he snuggled his head into my neck.

I winced as he hit the bruise on my throat.

He instantly jolted back, and examined my bruise.

"I will kill them.." He mumbled to himself as his fingers grazed my neck.

My eyes fluttered close as sleepiness took over my body.

My body was completely exhausted.

I slowly leaned my head back on Jax's chest as I yawned.

Jax held me in his strong arms as a non peaceful sleep over came me.

I knew that I would have a nightmare. I just knew it, and that's why I didn't want to sleep.

I know I'm safe now, but I'm not safe from my memories. I'm not safe from the past...and I'm afriad that if I'm not on guard...the past will attack me.

A/n: I sincerely apologise. I haven't updated like usual...I'm having such bad writer's block...this chapter has literally no humor in it..and I'm starting to lose my mind. It's going in the direction that I didn't want it to. But it will be fixed, humor is up to come. Please bare with me as I try to get through this writer's block.

~Jess