Better Off (Lil Peep)

Chapter 34: Madrid Bound

Samara's POV

We were only two days from Paris, and a week from the entire tour being over. I shivered just thinking about it, and about how I didn't want to go home. LA was a playground of many different things, but Europe- was all that and more.

Ally had said we could come back after tour was over and that we could stay with her as long as we wanted to. Gus included. I had yet to tell him but I would after the show was over tonight.

After London, last night, Wicca barely looked at me. He knew that we weren't a thing anymore. And that somehow me and Gus were. In some ways I felt entirely guilty. I didn't want to come between them. And yet somehow, I knew that I had to enjoy whatever moments I had with Gus.

There was something so easy and comfortable about talking to him. Existing with him. His charisma was undeniable and he was funny as hell and even in the darkest of moments he was a light.

As we drove away from London, my thoughts spun out. We sat next to each other, and he grabbed my hand, holding it, running his long tattooed fingers over my own. I smiled, feeling goosebumps along my arms at his touch.

I grinned at him, as he stared at me.

"Hey so I have an idea." He whispered in my ear.

"Oh yeah? Me too." I whispered back.

"You first."

"Do you wanna stay in Paris for a bit? My friend Ally has an open room and said we could stay.."

"Do you wanna stay in London after that? And by stay I mean, move there?"

"Oh my god. You mean leave LA for good?" 
His eyes sparkled back at me with a slow nod, as he lit a blunt for us right there on the bus.

"For a while anyways. I wanna get away with you." He looked right into what felt like my soul in the moment and I felt myself go red.

"I'm excited- Paris, London- I don't even know what to say." My heart thumped

"Say yes." He gave me a cheesy grin, his diamond pink grill peeking out of his perfect lips. His hand squeezed mine and I felt butterflies in my stomach.

"Yes."

"I wish I could just kiss you right now, fuck." I felt him nibble my ear anyways, his hot breath hitting my neck.

I felt my breath hitch and he grinned, half chuckling next to me.

"Could you be more obvious?" I playfully punched his arm, and he stuck his tongue out at me.

"Yes actually I could. Want me to?" He batted his lashes at me and I just rolled my eyes.

God damn he was too cute to handle sometimes.

I flipped him off and pulled out my phone. No new messages. I decided to text Ally and let her know we'd be around for a week or two.

Me: Hey girl! Just talked with Gus & we agreed to come stay for a week or so! Thanks so much in advance.

Ally: omg hey!! So excited to see you my love! And meet Lil Peep- like what?! Are you guys a thing? That's crazy. I can't wait.

Me: I'm so excited to see youuuu tooooo! And ummmm yeah!  pretty sure we're a thing- it's crazy!
He just asked me to move to London with him after we stay in Paris!

Ally: OMG! my best friend is moving to Europe with Lil Peep! This is so amazing, you won't be far from me anymore, I'm soooo happy for you ❤️

Me: I knowwww ahhhh Europe life!! Can't wait to give you the biggest hug in the world!

I clicked my phone off with a huge smile.

"Ally?" Gus grinned. I nodded, pressing my phone to my heart with a happy sigh.

"Can't wait to meet her." He smiled.

My heart was full as we drove onward, towards Madrid. We'd get there late, and the show would go on just hours after we arrived. It was yet another sold out show.

My mind raced, thinking about the three shows left on the tour, and how after, Gus and I would not be returning to the states. I was happy as hell, but my thoughts wandered to Goth- in some way I didn't want to leave him, to abandoned him in LA just after the big tour. We'd talked about traveling together and he was my best friend apart from Ally and Gus.
I didn't know what to tell him, or what I'd do living in England without him.

But I would take his advice. I would enjoy the time I had with Gus- whether it was weeks or years. Goth was right when he said that Gus could make anyone feel special no matter what the situation. I would stay with him- even if it was just a fling, for however long it lasted. And I wasn't about to obsess over it.
Any time I had on this Earth with someone so amazing by my side was all worth it. I wasn't gonna lie when I said I hated being alone. But with Gus, I was far from alone.

As we pulled into Madrid, it was dark and foggy. I chugged the rest of my coffee and jumped up. I was ready to go- another night, another show. The happiness and hope I felt for the future was immeasurable and for once it felt like the future was something to look forward too.

I was falling in love with Gustav Ahr, completely, and nothing had ever felt so right.