Veronica [Zarry]

to be vulnerable

"Hi," the little blonde chirps from behind the bar. Great.

"Did she quit?"

"Don't be silly, she called in sick. Loretta came in early this morning and was so impressed with how the place looked I don't think she minds if she calls in sick for the entire week. She deserves a break anyway."

So we agree on something.

"Yeah she does...thanks for letting me know," I give her a half smile and push my way through a sea of sweaty bodies.

I'm about to leave when I turn right back around and sit at my usual barstool.

"I need some scotch. Lots of it."

My head is spinning and all I can think about is the feeling on her lips on mine and the way she looked at me, like she felt the same way.

I'll drink to false hope. God, I must knock back several glasses before I switch to vodka, liking the way it burns my throat as is trickles down.

"Woah, easy there. I don't want to kick you out."

"S-sorry," I slur. "It's just that I really have feelings for her and I seem to always fall for people who push me away and I-"

My eyelids grow heavy, I feel so unbelievably tired, shoulders slumping forward and my forehead collides with the bar.

There's a bittersweet taste on my tongue and an image of her in my head, hair as dark as the night sky, eyes like honey. Her lips look like cherries but they taste like coconut.

I'm being shaken my the shoulders but all I want to do is sleep, stay trapped in my dream.

Where she's mine and I'm hers and all is right with the world.

I wake up slowly, drowsy, eyes adjusting to the light. My mind is playing tricks on me as I reach out and touch her face, hand trembling.

"Claire called me, she said she was about to call the paramedics. How much did you drink?"

"A bit," I give her a toothy grin and she rolls her eyes.

"Yeah I bet," she ruffles my curls. "I'm glad you're okay."

I melt a little and she helps me down from the barstool.

Everything is unsteady, the room is swaying and I topple but she catches my fall, hands on my hips.

"Easy," she whispers gently, stroking my hairline.

"I missed you, I said something I s-shouldn't have," I hiccup painfully. "Then you left me."

"I know, I'm so sorry," she murmurs, guiding me outside.

As soon as the cool air hits me I'm done for, puking out my insides on the curb.

She holds my hair back and I fall, ass scraping against the pavement.

"Oh dear," she exhales.

I hug my arms around my legs, rest my chin on my knees. The wind feels nice, my cheeks are hot, shirt sticky with sweat and my curls are plastered to my forehead.

"Lost a few grand on the market today, just wanted to see your face," I mumble. "To make me feel better, like less of a screw up."

She sits down beside me, doesn't seem to mind that we're at the edge of the parking lot.

"It's okay," she brushes some stray hair out of my face and I drop my hand, fumbling around for hers. Luckily, she catches on, shoots closer and laces our fingers together.

I look down at them, vision blurred with tears.

"It wasn't anything you said," she assures, breaking the silence. "Believe me Harry."

"You could at least give me a chance to prove you wrong."

Her eyes look distant, dark circles hanging heavily beneath them and she's wearing a frown on her face.

"I wanted you to take me home last night but I'm afraid if we rush things you'll be blindsided by the truth and you won't really understand me. I used to spend all night dancing. Men make a lot of promises, they're so quick to throw away their money, only to use you for one night and realize-"

She swallows the lump in her throat and pulls her hand away suddenly, like my touch accidentally shocked her.

"I'll get you an Uber."

"You're being so cold," I groan, curling my legs up under me again.

"What do you want from me? I can't make all your dreams come true. I can serve you drinks all night, dance for you until you get off but I can't give you everything Harry."

"I'm not asking for that much. If anything, you're the one who deserves the world. You desrve to know real love."

"Please, we hardly know each other and we should keep it that way. You know nothing about who I am, what I've done. You're going places. I'm stuck in reverse. Don't let me be the reason why you-"

She cuts herself short, eyes swimming with tears.

"I'll take you home, okay? That's it."

The ride is uncomfortable, silence stretching between us, my cheek pressed to the cool window.

I'm a mess, unable to find my keys. Frustration sets in and I kick at the door, muttering a string of curse words.

To be honest I'm not sure how we manage to make it inside but my knees give out on the bathroom rug as I clutch onto the rim of the toilet.

Veronica is patient and kind. She stays with me, hand on the small of my back.

"Brush your teeth babe."

I follow her instructions, tripping as I try to shimmy out of my jeans. She laughs lightly, adjusting the water for me in the shower.

My shirt is drenched with sweat and I eagerly peel it off.

Her eyes drink me in, fingers exloring my skin, softly tracing the outline of my tattoos.

Skin glistening, shivers each time she touches me. Fingertips trailing down my spine, nose brushing my neck.

I want to ask her what she's thinking but it's all too perfect. I'm terrified I'll ruin the moment.

Her hands are on my thighs, one slipping between them to stroke my hardness and my legs nearly give out beneath me.

There's a bead of pre-cum on my tip and her tongue collects it. My body is dissolving, eyes closing as she takes me somehwere else.

"Veronica," I moan, fingers tugging at her hair.

Everything stops but her arms are around me as I crumple, nothing but a mess of tears.

"I've never felt so naked," I cry, cheek pressing to her warm shoulder.

"It's okay," she whispers. "It's okay to be vulnerable."