wanted | bts

ㅣ5ㅣ

Jimin

Chubby.

That's all that people seem to care about.

Whether I weigh 59kg or 69kg, they notice.

They ask if I'm ok but I say I'm fine.

I'm just trying to be what you want be to be.

I stare in the mirror at myself. My body. My chubby cheeks, my thick thighs, my height. Nothing is perfect.

I work hard, sometimes too hard.

I push myself to the limit in order to achieve the fullest. Pushing my body against its will but I need to. If I don't they won't love me.

Everyday until 3am, I'm working. Either at the gym or in the studio, I'm working. Yoongi hyung has been keeping an eye on me, making sure I'm ok. But I just tell him I'm fine, I don't want pity, I don't want failure.

Abs. Muscles. Is that what I want? Or it is what they want?

Being an idol is hard. You have to look perfect all the time. Perfect body, perfect diet, perfect face.

So that's why I didn't sleep. That's why I'm tired but at least I'm getting there. One day I will reach my goal.

I'll loose the weight. I'll gain the muscles. I told myself this. But when I lost the weight and gained the muscles, was I supposed to feel happy? Was I supposed to instantly have no problems? Like finally I would be 'sexy' and not chubby little chimchim. But is that what you want?

I don't want to let you guys down but deep down I know it's myself I'm letting down.

One minute you say my cheeks are cute but they next minute I'm fat, and need to loose the weight.

I did ballet as a kid and I loved it. Expressing myself with my movements and dancing my heart out. All the other kids were slim and muscular, but not me.

I have always been chubby little chimchim. That no one wants.

A/N: Our little mochi has always been insecure about his weight and he even went on several strict diets.

He worked himself so sad that he even passed out on multiple occasions, once even on stage.

His is perfect the way he is and I don't think he should be forced to diet and loose the weight if he doesn't want to himself. The fans should love him whatever he weighs. Whether it be 59kg or 69kg, real fans love Jimin whatever.