wanted | bts

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A/N: Woop woop! This book hit 200 reads haha, making progress people! 🙌😊🎉😆💜
Facts about me at the end!

Namjoon

I've made many mistakes in my life.

Whether it was my shitty stage name I made in 8th grade cause I thought it was cool. Come on, Rap Monster, seriously. You're a human, not a monster.

Or songs, that I deeply regret making. Songs that pop up everywhere, making an appearance. People keep referencing it and talking about the lyrics and I just want to hide. Crawl up and die because I hate myself for creating it. I regret making such songs and I am disappointed in myself. I feel like I let the team down.

But it's ok now, I guess.

I try to be the best leader I can be. I try my hardest, I really do and I am so proud of them all. They all work hard, each and every one of them. They are all unique and special in there own way and it's such a pleasure to be working with such an amazing group of people. They are like family.

I work hard, night and day, working. Writing lyrics, preparing speeches, attending meetings. It's all I ever do. I get my days off and that's when I can sleep, take a time to relax. Spend time with the other members and live life. I love being in BTS but of cause it gets hard sometimes.

All the backlash, all the hate directed at me. I know I'm not the most attractive member, I'm really not, but to be called the least attractive and least talented member, it hurts. Yes, it may be true but I don't need to be told that. Not by who I thought were fans.

I try my hardest to be the best I can be and to help the boys be the best they can be too. And to hear things like that doesn't help at all. I try not to let it get to me though, I put on a brave face and smile through everything. Every interview, every Live, everything, I need to try and be happy so you don't see that I'm actually upset. Upset with myself, and what I've produced.

•••

('The hardest thing about being an idol is that you have to pretend to be happy, even when you're not' - RM.
I remember reading that somewhere and it opens your eyes to what they actually go through. I can't remember when/where he said it and they quote isn't exactly word-for-word but that's what I remember it to be - I can't find it online again. Anyway back to the normal writing)

•••

It's tough, but we all get through it, together. Me being the leader has it's cons and comes with loads of responsibilities that I just can't manage on my own. I need their help and all of them are helpful. They help me, not only in work but when I'm sad. When I'm down and need cheering up or just when it all gets too much, they are there for me.

We are all soldiers, fighting. And you are our army. The real ARMY. You help us when are in deepest need and you provide is with our weapons. We don't want you to fight, we don't want arguments. They can hurt BTS but they can't hurt our ARMY. They can hate us all they want but they can't destroy our bond. Between fans and all members, we are family.

For our bond is forever strong and it cannot be broken. However hard they try to bring us down, they won't succeed, for we are fighting.

A/N: woop de woop! Another chapter!

Now for the facts: