echo // hemmings [completed]

thirty-five | come

—January 23rd—

As she led Olivia to Drew's room, about a million thoughts swirled around in Rowan's head. Thoughts that brought her guilt, thoughts that made her remember, and thoughts that turned into fears. She had no idea how to react to Olivia's sudden entrance back into her life and she hadn't the slightest clue of how to even begin talking to her.

But luckily, Olivia was the one who initiated the conversation. 

"How have you been?"

"Good? I don't know. I think I'm doing alright," Rowan said nervously. "You?"

"Honestly? Better than I thought I would be," the older girl told her. "I thought I would be knee deep in self destruction by now, but strangely, I'm not. I mean I was for the first month I was, but right now? As I'm talking to you? I think I'm okay. And I'm glad to hear you're doing alright." But Olivia didn't believe that Rowan was "alright". The dark rings under her eyes, the marks on her palms from where she dug her nails in, and the way her hand shuddered as she gestured for her to enter Drew's room; her old friend still had the same tells as before. 

"So why're you here?" Rowan asked. "You didn't come here for a casual chat and you were never really one for leisure trips."

"You're right. I came to talk about something more serious," the long haired girl admitted.

"Like what?"

Olivia began to pace around Drew's room as she spoke, a habit from her anxiety that she had been failing to break for years. "Come live with me."

"What?" Rowan asked shakily. "Why?"

"Your mom said you'd be better living with someone. She says you've been acting a bit... Off recently."

"Off? She barely talks to me. How would she know?" Rowan scoffed, crossing her arms across her chest.

"I thought the same thing. I agreed that you didn't need to be looked after." Olivia took a deep breath. "But now...I don't know."

"What do you mean, Liv?"

"Rowan, you look tired and... Maybe you do need someone. Someone to help you cope, someone like me."

"I'm sorry Olivia, but that's bull." Rowan had to stop herself from raising her voice as she spoke. Her mother had no right to dictate her life as they had been walking on separate paths for too long now. And now Olivia? One of her cherished friends was starting to see through her facade and she hated it. "I'm fine."

"Then why do you look so scared?" Olivia questioned. "Why are you clenching your fists as you talk to me?"

The short haired girl didn't even realize how tense her posture had become. She released her fists, but she still felt wound up. "I have things to do here. In Sydney," she said through gritted teeth.

"Like what Rowan?!" Olivia had begun to match up with Rowan's anger. "What's more important? Is it that guy? Michael?"

"No! It's not!"

"Then what is it? Why can't you come with me?" And then Rowan realized something. Olivia's persistence wasn't coming out of a need to bring her back. But a want to not be alone in her little apartment in California. 

"There's things I need to settle here. Things I need to help with," she reasoned. "I have my own life here, Liv!"

"Fine! It's fine," Olivia muttered before taking in a deep breath. "Sorry for yelling. I've just been on edge recently."

"Yeah, I can relate."

"You know what? I'll talk to you tomorrow," Olivia said. "I just need to cool off. I'm sorry."

"It's totally fine," Rowan told her, a little relieved. "Where are you staying?"

"A hotel not too far from here. Don't worry. I've got a car rented so I can drive back." 

After their conversation Rowan led her distressed friend out the door. She felt drained from all the yelling and talking and decided it would be best for her to immediately go back to her motel room. But she felt guilty leaving without explaining things to Michael and went to search for him.

He was spread out on his bed with his headphones in, the music playing absurdly loud. When he saw her he quickly took them out and sat up to face her. He asked if she was alright and what happened and his eyes were so full of curiosity and confusion that Rowan felt that he deserved a full explanation, no matter how tired she was.

So she told him everything, about her past with Drew's sister, about how her mother wouldn't relinquish control over her life, and about the offer that was presented to her.

"So you're from California?" Was all Michael said after listening to her tangent. He was listening earnestly and was giving her his full attention, but he was never good at conversation and always ended up asking filler questions like this.

"No, Seattle. We moved to Cali when I was young."

"Oh," was all the boy could respond with. "That's cool. What part of California?"

"Oakland, it's around an hour away from San Francisco," Rowan recalled.

"San Francisco?"

"Yeah, have you been there?"

"No, but that's where Dr. Jenkins is," Michael stated before ruffling through the papers on his nightstand.

"Who?" 

Michael pulled out a pamphlet and handed it to her. "Dr. Savannah Jenkins, the best eye doctor in America."

"Alright... And?" Rowan said, not quite catching up with what Michael was saying.

"She's the last doctor Luke's gonna see for a while. His mum has been begging for an appointment for months and he's going in February."

"That's good news right?"

"Yeah, but Liz, Luke's mum, is getting cold feet. She doesn't know if she can handle another unsuccessful procedure. So I was gonna go. But maybe..." Michael set the pamphlet down in Rowan's lap before looking her in the eye. "... You should."

-

a/n: i'm so happy to be reading all of your comments!

i have been busy with school so thank you for your patience xx