echo // hemmings [completed]

twenty-four | virus

—October 28th—

Ashton didn't like studying. He did whatever he could to avoid it. This bad habit resulted in below average grades and an inability to stare at a textbook for too long. So studying and trying to catch up with all his classes was difficult for him. He couldn't comprehend most of the information he read and he couldn't even explain the things he understood. All of it was just blurry to him. 

He would try and read the notes and the pages filled with text, but in the end it just seemed unclear to him. It was like he couldn't hold onto a thought for too long before letting it slip away. Which is why this was one of those moments in Ashton's life in which he wished he was smarter. It was one of those times when he wished he could spell every word right and memorize things with ease. But he couldn't do these things and this made him feel dumb.

He shut the book he was reading closed and took a deep breath. He looked at Rowan sitting less than a foot away. There she was, sitting with her legs crossed as she scribbled out annotations on his papers.

She had been coming over to Ashton's place everyday for the last week, studying with him and reading textbooks. She said she needed something to get her mind off of things, and he just happened to be in a position which required her help.

"What's a Trojan Horse Virus?" Ashton asked, breaking the silence between them. He was studying for his beginners computer class and was having trouble comprehending some of the terms. Rowan put down her pencil and faced Ashton.

"Well... Remember in ninth grade when we all learned about the Trojan War?" Rowan asked. 

Ashton nodded. "Yeah, the Greeks gave the Trojans a horse as a gift, but at night soldiers came out of it and attacked them."

"Exactly. So a Trojan Horse Virus is a trick that hackers use. They disguise malicious computer programs as something useful and harmless. And once you let it into your securely locked device, it attacks you." She took a deep breath. "It's like giving someone something harmless, telling them its a good thing... When you know it's a bad thing, and it's going to hurt them."

Ashton formed a fist with his hand, tightening his grip around his pencil until he was clutching it with all his might.  "Yeah, I think I get it."

"But never mind that, keep studying. You need to keep up with your classes," she said, flashing a smile to assure him that she was alright. But she wasn't alright, and Ashton knew. Because every time Rowan flashed that smile, she would bite her tongue. Holding back words every time, never saying what was on her mind, never saying what she wanted. And Ashton hated it, how she walked on eggshells all the time, how she was so cautious and shy, how she wasn't the bold and resilient girl he knew she was.

And he was fucking sick of it.

"Rowan..." He mustered up all his courage, he was going to tell her how upset he felt. So maybe he could rile her up just enough, that she would tell him how she felt. "Rowan-"

"Study. Let's study Ashton. Just study," she said sternly, not looking him in the eye as she interrupted him. 

"Okay," was all Ashton could say back. He had lost all of his momentum just like that. "Alright."

Rowan looked at his defeated expression and immediately felt bad for not letting him finish his phrase. "I know you want to talk, but... Not now Ashton. Right now, let's just pretend everything's okay. Let's act like two normal college kids studying after break. Just. Two. Normal. College. Kids. Alright?"

"But Rowan, you can't expect us to pretend forever. We're gonna figure this out." And with that phrase, he did it. He had riled her up. Because Rowan was fed up with the whole "we're gonna figure this out" attitude everyone was giving her. She didn't want that. She wanted a "guys, let's fix this," attitude. An attitude that would get things done. 

"Stop Ashton! No more figuring things out!" Rowan screamed using a sorrowful tone. "Everyone keeps saying we can fix this, but honestly all we've done is lie and that hope everything is going to work out." And Ashton couldn't deny what she was saying. They were all liars; awfully insane liars that couldn't help but keep going. They were going to have to live off their lies and hopefully never get caught. But every good liar knows, that in the end everyone gets caught.

-

a/n: sorry this was a little shorter and kinda rushed

thank you again for reading, i never would've expected the amount of reads to accumulate like this

xx