Fate (PIPABETH FF) ✔️

Routine Worry

P I P E R

I was still.

The soft sound of breathing was all I could hear as I laid in bed, unmoving, eyes shut as I begged for sleep to come soon. If it didn't, I would be left to my own vices and would most likely end up thinking too deeply about something. Or worse, fall into a rabbit-hole of my own creation. What would it happen to be? The latest conspiracies? Were there even any tinfoil hat government skeptics in the camp? 

I shivered and tried to clear my head. There was nothing worse than a rabbit-hole, much less one that came unprompted in the middle of the night.

One sheep. Two sheep. Three sheep. Four...?

I bit back a loud sigh and allowed my mind to travel at the thought plaguing my brain. What had happened earlier was certainly a good thing now that we had all made up, but I couldn't help but feel worried. 

For starters, I like to think that I'm not stupid. 

I had noticed Annabeth's gaze on me more than once, and it was very concerning. Her brows were slightly furrowed, and she was visibly chewing on her lip like her life depended on it. She seemed like she was analyzing me, judging me, even– but that couldn't be the case. Could it...?

She had even seemed slightly distant. 

Was it something I did? Have I even done anything recently? I wondered, shifting around my bed. I buried my face in the feather comforters and sighed. I convinced myself that it would be fine– Annabeth didn't have a reason to be angry at me, did she? My mind traveled back to the distant past. As far as I knew, the only people that she got angry at were Percy, Jason, and Drew, but even so, I was always by her side. 

I sat up and fluffed my pillow before slumping back onto it with a quiet sigh. 

Which brought me to my next dilemma. 

Would I ever love again...?

I stayed silent for a moment before holding back a snicker. Well, that was a stupid question. A stupid question that I already knew the answer to, anyways. So what if I had a heartbreak? So what if Jason cheated? So what if I really felt betrayed that very day?

Well, to be fair, those were very important things in their own right. But that was the past, and now I had no choice but to look towards the future while still staying logical in the present. Or, that's what I would be thinking if my logic wasn't currently telling me that I sounded stupid. 

How could I ask a question such as that if I already had a person in mind...?

My face felt hot, and shame crept into my chest as I thought of the possibilities. Of all people, why her...?  I scolded myself repeatedly, various scenarios circling my mind as I bit my tongue in apprehension. Annabeth Chase. 

The one and only. The tall, lean, and blonde menace, the daughter of Athena herself. Annabeth in all her glory– tattered baseball cap, light battle scars and all. 

Annabeth. 

Her name was both foreign and familiar at the same time. Familiar due to our day-to-day interactions, but horribly distant due to the strange butterflies that fluttered in my stomach at the mere thought of her strong gray gaze. What seemed to be just a normal word, a normal name had suddenly evolved into something... well, simply, not normal. 

The way my pulse quickened definitely was not normal, anyways. 

My ears felt unbelievably hot. There was no use denying what I felt, that much I knew. Anything more than simple denial, and I'd just be spewing lies to my own self. Which could probably help suppress and fend off any lingering emotions for a short period of time, but I wasn't going to risk it. 

Why on earth would I deny the feelings I got? I was not as stupid as to ignore the lightness in my brain or the dizziness clouding my mind as I interacted with the other girl. 

Which brought me to my next... dilemma.

I brought the large comforter up close to my warm face as I sighed inaudibly, chest heaving in apprehension. 

What in Hades was I meant to do if we decided to keep fake-dating? Sure, it had been quite a mess from the very beginning, but it had allowed for...

I gulped, reminiscing the moment in which Annabeth had kissed me. It had allowed for that, and truthfully, I was really enjoying the sides that she was showing me, even away from other's gazes.

I knew Annabeth (at least, I hoped I did). If I knew something about her, it was that she would not give up very easily. She would not just kick the game plan under the rug. 

I shifted uncomfortably in my spot. Would she...? 

Because frankly, if she did, that would be just my luck. Really. If we kept it up, I think I would have already combusted. 

Another blatant lie. 

My blanket suddenly felt overbearingly hot as my mind traveled a million miles per second. I didn't want it to end. I didn't care if it were still fake, I just wanted it to continue. And even as the guilt of the thoughts pressed heavily on my shoulders, I couldn't help but grin stupidly as I recounted all the events that had occurred during the past week. Annabeth had been stupidly nervous to the point where it was almost ridiculously adorable. I had been blessed with the opportunity to see multiple instances of Annabeth's nervous, anxious side as opposed to her usually level-headed self. 

And gods above  was it cute. 

I frowned at myself as I caught myself in the act of grinning like a fool. Relax, Piper. Don't count your chickens before they hatch. 

I blinked. 

What's the point? I don't even have chickens. It can't hurt...?

With that thought in mind, I allowed my eyes to flutter shut, basking in the warm feelings left behind by my thoughts. It was almost pathetic how much I seemed to long for the other girl– like my heart was singing an incomplete melody, wailing pitifully as it anticipated a song back. 

Of course, I was already preparing myself. In case Annabeth didn't... wasn't... you know. Sure, she was supportive, but that didn't always mean that she...

I bit my lip.

Even so, it would still hurt. It wouldn't matter how much preparation I would allow myself to have. At this point, I didn't know which would sting more– her saying no, or me not bringing anything up at all, allowing this facade to continue until its inevitable end. 

With a huff, I buried my face back into the sheets, forcefully clearing my head. Whatever happened from this point on would just be left to destiny, or whatever other factors played into it. 

After all, it didn't matter whatever actions I decided to take. No matter what, there would be a certain fate brought to me, woven intricately by the Moirai, handled as delicately as spiderwebs were swayed by the morning breeze. 

I just hoped the future in sight was the one I so longed for. 

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wow full revision down to the title!!

-mar 21, 22