Hopeless State Of Mind

Real.

I don't mean to offend
Those around me
When they tell me
They love me
Or they care for me.

Don't get me wrong,
I love and
Care for them
Too.

But I know
That of I say
It out loud,
Then it's real.
And when it's real,
Something will go wrong.
And I don't want something
To go wrong because I
Don't want to be hurt again,
And I'm not sure
If I can handle that.

And if they ask me
What's wrong
I tell them I'm fine
Because If I tell them
The truth
Then it's real
And I don't want it
To be real,
I want to be fine,
I need to believe I'm fine.
Because If I don't
Then no one else will
And they'll try and
Know what's wrong.
I don't want that.

I don't want to
Say anything
Because it becomes
Real or something
Goes wrong.
And that's not good.