Room 1013

Chemo

When Lance was slowly pulled out of sleep, he came to notice the sun had not peeked over the horizon yet. He pushed himself up and searched for what had woken him. As he turned his head, the sound of gagging snapped his attention toward the bathroom. The door was cracked with a faint yellowish light pooling out. Lance quickly threw the blankets off and jumped out of bed. He crept toward the sound. With gentle pressure, he pushed the door open using his fingertips.

Keith sat on his knees leaning over the toilet bowl. His chest pulsed with heaving breaths and gags underneath Lance's grey sweater. He wiped his mouth with his wrist and lifted his head to look up at Lance. A cough escaped his throat before he could find his voice. "Uh," he forced a playful smile. His skin was pale and sagging off his cheeks. Surrounding his pitifully broken body were mini tufts of black hair lying on the white marble tile. Even with his pathetic frame, his eyes still held their sparkle. Two violet nebulae staring up at him within a vortex of hope. "Good morning."

"Oh Keith," Lance's chest ached at the sight. He lowered down to his knees and placed an arm around Keith's back.

Keith sniffled and quickly brought a hand up to cover his mouth. After a few seconds of uncomfortable rocking, he heaved and pulled it away to vomit into the toilet. "Ugh," he laced his fingers into his hair and spit to clear his mouth. "Sorry I woke you up."

"Don't ever feel like you can't wake me up." Lance leaned over and kissed the top of his head. "This isn't your fault."

Keith groaned and sat back on his knees and ran his wrist over his lips. "Still sucks, though."

"Here," Lance reached up to the towel ring and yanked it down to wipe the vomit off his mouth and arms.

Keith let him clean off his skin as he chuckled. His eyes scanned the floor around him, "My hair's falling out again."

Lance placed the towel next to him and looked around at the speckles of black. "Yeah, it is."

Keith's mouth curved into a smile as his throat formed a giggle. He dropped his hands to the floor and lifted his eyes to the ceiling. "I'm gonna be bald."

Lance scrunched his eyebrows together as he stared in confusion. He had never seen Keith this sick. The chemo drugs he was on now were harder on his body than the ones he had taken before. Lance knew he was in pain. He had to be in so much pain. Yet, Keith reacted as if it was any normal day. Maybe he was too sick to react the way he should've. As supportive and loving Lance wanted to be, Keith was scary. He was ashamed that he felt disturbed by his behavior, but it happened. The feeling was there.

Lance quickly shook away the anxiety that boiled in his chest. This was his husband. The love of his life. Nothing like this was too much for him. It couldn't be. This was just an introduction to the horrors they had yet to go through. Keith was going to get a lot sicker and look a lot worse than he did then. They made a vow to be there for each other for better or for worse.

This was not the worst.

Lance gently wrapped his arms around Keith's shoulders, being careful to allow him room to retreat if he needed to throw up. He kissed his hair, "I don't care if you're bald." He took in a breath of Keith's strawberry-scented skin. "I care if you're alive."

Keith shook his head and lifted a hand. He ran his fingers through his dulled hair, closing his eyes against the pressure. When it exited his head, a clump of black was threaded in the creases of his hand. With a dropped smile and droopy eyes, he held it up for Lance to see. Keith articulated every syllable he spoke, "I'm gonna be bald."

Lance stared in amazement for a moment before his eyes relaxed. He sighed and pushed himself off the floor. Taking one last look back at Keith, he stepped out of the bathroom. "I'll go get the broom."