Why Change? (Straight furry story)

48. Why?

I felt a judder as the the tires skid on the tarmac. When I finally got home I slid my keys into the door, but it was unlocked. I opened the door and found that there was nothing, the house had been cleared out. I go back to the car and ask the driver whether he can get me to Queensland. "nah, but we can do multiple stops, I can't drive you the full way though" I decide to go to the motorbike dealership. "that'll be $37.50" he says, I pay him and get out. I head straight toward the main building.

I get a used motorcycle and take off down the road, at the maximum speed allowed. When I get on the highway I think about everything. Why was I in Oregon? Why was I in a mental hospital? Why were they so clueless about who I was? Why did Janet help me, moreover, How did she know I lived in Darwin? How did the counsellor not know who she was dealing with? Why was my house empty? Why was there no note? or letter? Why don't I remember? I don't remember anything that happened after... I passed out, at the foot of a tree, crying. Who found me? Why did they take me to a mental hospital in Oregon? then I remembered before it, I killed 38 people, then I broke down, It was all coming back, but the only conclusion to why, was I killed people, then ran to the foot of a tree. But even that didn't make too much sense to me.

I had to keep moving, if I kept obsessing about it, I would never get there, so, I try to clear my mind and remember how to get there, as I didn't have my phone. I had to leave it in Darwin because 'the enemy can track telecommunicator devices' if I am quoting what the warrant officer said. The warrant officer was good, he took me from a place of self doubt to a place where I knew everyone, where I could actually work productively. I owe him for what he has done for me, then I realised, the warrant officer did more for me in 12 months, that specialised shool couldn't do in 12 years. I wonder how Vexera is going. I haven't said her name for what felt like forever. I need to find her.

After driving for nearly 22 hours, I make it to the RAAF base Amberly, I scan the parking lot for my old motorcycle. It isn't there, so I cruise up to the gates and scan my ID, there is a beep and the gates don't open, then a person steps out of the booth "sorry, but your ID is out of date we'll have to get you a new one" he says, and lead me into a separate booth. After that, I go straight to the archives, I go to the P section, I'm looking for Peters, Kennedy Peters.