SETTLE DOWN, matty healy

Chapter 14: This Must be My Dream

"My thoughts of you are clouding my everyday activities, how on Earth can you do that? I haven't even seen you today."

"Ah, I tend to have such an effect. Thoughts of you simply make for good poetry, but not everything can be written in a few lines."

"I need to see you, if that's the case I'm mad with desire."

"Not even I'm that overdramatic, love-"

I noticed my mother peering over my shoulder at the dinner table and I shut my phone, finishing up my dinner. "You've been in a good mood recently. Can't help but wonder what exactly it is," She suggested.

I simply chuckled, taking a bite out of the pasta. "Ryder just sent me a funny meme, that's all," I said, trying to steer her away from her insinuations. Though, considering I haven't taken my meds for a month now without her noticing, I'm surprised at myself for maintaining this good a mood.

"Whatever it is, I'm glad to see you smiling again, Emma. It's a nice change," My dad said next and I nodded in agreement, none of them continuing the conversation for the rest of dinner.

"My Emma, the loveliest of minds I've ever come to know, writes poetry about me that she won't even share with me? How on earth can you hurt me so."

"God, relax. Maybe I don't think it's that good of poetry."

"All poetry you write is amazing poetry."

Ryder eyed me on the laptop screen and I noticed her shaking her head. "These millennials, always on their phones."

I crossed my legs and shut my phone for a second to rest my head. "Can't I not just be this joyous without anyone commenting? I've discovered how to maintain an entire conversation using gifs and I'm happy about it," I told her, "Besides, we're Gen Z, not millennials geez."

She only laughed hysterically and shook her head. "Geez, done with your little rant there? I only made a simple joke, Emerson," She said and I laughed along with her, the two of us now moving onto a conversation about a Gardening Club being petitioned on campus and such. How the club would, in Ryder's words, 'enhance the transcendentalist I see myself as'.

"Nothing is like Walden nowadays, but I suppose joining another club could do me some sort of good." This caused for her to clap in agreement and she was soon logging off to head to bed. I, on the other hand, pressed myself against my phone again, hearing it ring persistently. Picking it up I smirked, looking out the window wondering how on earth he could be thinking of me right now. "I think the act is a bit overplayed, I know you want to see me-"

"Tomorrow. Dinner. At my apartment," Matty fragmented, causing for me to chuckle at his lack of sentence structure.

"For someone with a masters in English, I have to say I'm a better conversationalist than you are," I teased him, hearing him huff in annoyance on the other line.

Instead of a quick snarky comment, he only sighed. "I'm cooking for you and I want you to take up the offer. It's not as if the two of us can have much time alone on campus is all and-"

"Love, I wasn't planning on missing out on a chance to see you. I do, however, want to actually get some rest. Now can you please just tell me good night and use a simile or metaphor to describe me and all that Jazz," I interrupted him to say, feeling warmth well-up in me upon hearing his laugh.

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
so long lives this and this gives life to thee," Matty said on the other line, my heart not helping to swoon despite the fact that, at times, Shakespeare with love proved to be overrated, "Goodnight Emma."

I rolled my eyes and shut off my lamp beside my bed. "Goodnight Shakespeare."

***

Now was the first in many Mondays I found myself to not dread going to school or being around anyone in particular. This, of course, springing interest amongst Ryder and Anna. "Did you drink your coffee earlier this morning? You're particularly eager for school today."

I shrugged, clutching onto my notebooks as I balanced on my shoes to eye them. Though it killed me to hide this even from them, but I knew I couldn't take the risk. "Yeah, I had coffee before I got here. This is kinda my second round." I held up the travel mug and the two laughed, not surprised at the comment and believing my words.

However a slight whiff of cigarettes trying to be masked under cologne caused for me to turn around and see Mr. Healy walking through the gates of the school. His hair bounced in the bun he had fashioned for himself; his sunglasses blocking his glance as he sipped into his own coffee. I felt myself want to leap towards him, only seeing him give me a quick nod and smile before moving on his way.

Soon the bell rang and Ryder, Anna, and I were separated into our designated first periods. The schoolwork in front of me was enough to busy myself from not drifting away to thinking about Matty in any way. Yet, upon walking into his classroom, I soon realized the difficulty of hiding this situation for me as opposed to him.

Anna listened onto his lecture eagerly and I only mildly listened to him speak, mostly just busying myself with notes instead. Every so often upon pauses, he'd run his fingers past my desk before heading over to the computer to switch to the next slides. Whether intentional or not, I couldn't help to feel him teasing me and having him act so nonchalantly.

When the bell for lunch soon rang, I couldn't help myself to slowly pack up my things, enough so for Anna to say she's catch up with me so her and Ryder could get themselves seats of their own. Looking up I saw Matty shaking his head at me with a small laugh. "At what lengths are you taking for even a small conversation," He mentioned.

I shrugged, slinging my backpack on. "Enough so for me to actually have a brief moment with you," I said, "Besides, I'm only staying after this time to confirm our plans for tonight."

He chuckled and nodded happily. "I've already got all the items I need bought, don't you worry," Matty said and I only nodded in agreement and headed on my way, "That's all? Are you sure."

I stopped at the door, not helping myself to lean against the doorway to smirk at him. "Do love the bun on you by the way, there's also that- I'll see you tonight, Healy." I shot him a wink and went on my way.