SETTLE DOWN, matty healy

epilogue

Song Selection: I Know You Know I Love You by Sunset Rollercoaster

The seats were filled in the auditorium that night to have me wish to be anywhere else besides here as the speeches lingered on longer than I'd hope they would. My mind continued to dawdle for a few moments to have me realize that I barely knew anyone in just the crowd around me even though I'd be here for the four years. Strange how things like that can happen. "Emma-" The girl beside me nudged me awake as I noticed we were now standing to have our names called.

I nodded persistently, moving ahead with my row as the sea of students now awaited an empty case meant to hold the diploma we would receive in two weeks after the ceremony. "Emma Carson." I stepped up with the sound of my name, shaking hands with the principal and head of the district before moving back down to my seat.

It's funny. It's not really all that exciting in the moment.

Yet when I sat in my seat, the realization of having to introduce and occupy myself with a whole new set of students occurred to have me grow terrified over the changes. Looking to the crowd for a moment to where I had heard the faint cheers of my parents, I could barely make them out at the top of the bleachers where they were no doubt just as eager for this to end as I was.

"And now congratulations to the class of 2018." Seeing as we were threatened by faculty to not throw our caps into the air at the ceremony, the fact that every student no longer owed anything to the school caused for majority if not everyone to throw their caps into the air in unison.

This caused an absolute distasteful look on the teachers around us for tonight, everyone simply ignoring them and heading off in their rows outside of the auditorium to meet with family. Looking around myself to anyone I could recognize, I instead found Anna to which jumped into my arms immediately as a greeted. I laughed at this and hugged her back before setting her down to look to her confused. "This isn't the last you're seeing me you know."

"Oh I know, I just had to see you," She explained to shove me along, "Beside you'll be in Boston soon for university so we should just annoy each other with the time we have."

Jumping at someone coming up behind me, I turned back to see Ryder rolling her eyes over Anna's remark. "You do realize the bus ride from New York to Boston is only 4 hours. It could be worse," She explained.

I nodded, holding onto the two of them tightly. "We've gotten old haven't we?"

Anna sighed. "Sadly, we have." I looked back to see her parents ushering her to go along to have her frown. "I'll see you guys tomorrow for our date."

Ryder nodded, hugging me again before backing over to where her parents were. "Bye, Em."

Looking around to the amount of excitement and flash photography in the small area, I couldn't help to laugh at the sight. "Emma there you are," My Dad said to have me notice him holding a camera as well.

My hopes of my parents being different than the others soon ceased as I became another teen in the algorithm posing for more than a dozen photos for their pleasure. I didn't mind it, if they enjoyed it then it was enough that I could take.

And with that it was over. 4 years of schoolwork in a bogus system, gone. There was more waiting for me now, which was scary sure but romantic all in the same.

Coming back home to a surprise party held for my parents that ended soon after considering the fact it was a Thursday, midnight struck to have me tuck myself away into bed early before hearing my phone ringing on my bedside. Taking the call, I placed it to my ear half asleep. "Hello-"

"I'm outside."

I sat myself awake at this, taking the phone to look out the window to see a familiar face waiting for me in the driveway. Smiling to myself, I grabbed my things quickly to sneak out of the house as quietly as I could without my parents noticing I'd gone.

***

I swung my leg carelessly in the window sill of Matty's apartment as he smoked a cigarette across from me.  Sipping the coffee he'd made, I looked over to him interested. "You going to mention it?" I asked.

He laughed over this. "Mention what?"

"Matty I'm not going to be around here anymore. It'll be different," I explained to him.

Putting out the cigarette, he set aside the ashtray to look to me seriously. "Emma, I know you're leaving. It makes no difference if you're in Boston or you're here, I won't let you go." He leaned back for a moment to smirk up to me. "Beside you can deflate my ego even tens of thousands of miles away, I think we'll be alright."

I shoved him aside at the comment, watching him for a moment. His eyes were focused on the city while his hair was tied up. He'd been trying to grow out the beard this month which had no complaints by me, the stubble still barely forming in struggled attempts. He was mine again- and I didn't plan to lose it. "I love you, y'know."

He smiled, stepping down from the window sill to go over to the stereo and set in another tape. Stepping out as well, Matty extended a hand out to me to have me take it for a moment so he could pull me into his arms. "I love you."

The music continued to drown out the sounds of the city outside, slowly filling the apartment instead as the two of us simply danced along in our own solitude. It was just the two of us, with no bother to occur anymore after all this time. Neither of us wanted to settle down, it was still so soon. He's mine and that's just fine for now or ten years from now. What mattered was neither of us was going to let the other go, not this time—

That was it.