SETTLE DOWN, matty healy

Chapter 26: Give Yourself a Try

Song Selection: successful by Ariana Grande

The airport gloom mimicked the growing mood between my former lover and I, feeling sick to fall for such clichés now; today of all days. Parking the car at the drop off zone, he helped me grab my things quietly as I stepped out from the backseat of his car. Though the two of us had only exchanged in a call previously of me lacking a ride from someone who could take me to the airport, the tension still waited to be discussed the whole drive here. I eyed Matty standing before me here finally, being able to catch all the details I would forever miss.

The thought alone caused for me to tear up as I placed my bags down for a moment. His face saddened at me feeling this way, not knowing what decision was best for the two of us at this moment. "Do you regret it?" I asked him, sniffling a bit, "Any of it?"

He ran his hand through his hair for a moment, sighing under his breath. Looking back up to me his eyes were beginning to redden. "You should be loving someone better-"

"I'm stuck loving you- You know that very well."

"And I wish it weren't true." Matty exhaled for a moment and nodded. "I do regret it. All of it."

I rubbed my eyes, shaking my head and raising the handler above my suitcase. "I took you for a lot of things Matty-" Taking one more look at him as he fixed the jacket he had on, my heart couldn't help to fall for him again and again. "But never a liar."

***
5 months earlier...

I continued to reload the application site the hour the decisions were to be made, growing more and more anxious as there were no results at this point. Poetry Club continued to busy themselves around me with me engrossed on my cellphone, Evan and Liz looking to each other before me to have me slowly lift my gaze to them. "You know in an hour when the meeting is over you'll still find out the decision too, right?"

Lifting my gaze from their small grins I couldn't help to do the same and shut off the application site on my iPhone. "Fine, fine. What's there to lead on today anyways?"

Arthur turned to me then with a pout, holding the whiteboard marker out to me as I stood on a stool to reach the uppermost part of the board just to be able to write out what was needed. "We're just writing out what we're gonna need for the club fundraiser." He chuckled under his breath. "Because coffee and donuts needed so much room to be written down apparently."

I smiled up, giving him a hand to help him down. "Honestly would've done the same, babe. You're fine," I mentioned and nudged him playfully as the four of us discussed the matters that were intended to be went over for our board meeting. 'Course Matty wasn't to be seen as he was in a meeting of his own, but the classroom was open during lunch so we had enough time to go over everything.

"It's February and I need it to be another month closer to June already, y'know. I can't take Mr. Hawley's history exams another day it's killing me," Evan complained with a resounding agreement from the rest of us.

Arthur sighed in disgust. "And be one step closer to having to go through the bullshit of college applications? Hard pass." The bell rung suddenly with us having organized the small necessity of items between board and overview of the plans for the month quickly, leaving me to return to the loading site of the application page. The server was lagging in loading time as everyone laughed at the site of me in panic, awaiting my reaction to see if the news was good or bad.

The blank screen soon lit up again to the login page and I groaned, entering in my information before sending me back to the application. Matty opened the door, allowing for his next class to pass through as he looked to the four of us curiously. "Sorry Mr. Healy, we're waiting for Emma's results with her," Liz mentioned.

"They thought it'd be nice to have the support," I continued, Matty laughing under his breath with a soft smile.

He stepped up as well to stand over them, the class of freshman coming in looking to us confused. "Well then can't it load fast enough?" Matty said, leaning over my shoulder along with everyone else.

Scrolling down the page to the status icon I scrolled it to the right, being greeted with a bright green with the bold letters written within the box. "Wait-" I refreshed the page to make sure it wasn't an error and grinned widely at the same message standing within the page. "I actually got in?"

"Aye! There's our president!" Evan exclaimed first to have the three of them envelope me in a tight hug, causing for our commotion to only send the younger peers raising their brows to us as if we've gone mental. "Now c'mon Ms. London we do have classes to attend."

I nodded understandingly and continued to laugh the news, following along with them before I turned back to Matty who had stopped me by taking my hand for a moment. He let go just as quickly and cleared his throat to nod to me pridefully. "Congrats Emma-"

Stopping to hug him tightly as well I sighed in content for a moment. "Thanks Mr. Healy," I said, the two of us having hugged for long enough to cause for my fellow board members to look rather confused over the situation before he bid us adieu and we all went our own separate ways.

***

Catching a glimpse of the sunflowers Matty had let me paint on the apartment windows for kicks before our movie night, I rested my head against his chest as the television continued to play Rebel Without a Cause whilst I held the popcorn in my midst tightly. "I'm going to be in another country for two months," I suddenly realized, my anxiety now stemming from the sudden change of pace for my summer.

Matty laughed at this as I lifted my head up to him, having him fix my hair from being tangled. "Emma I think you'll be fine. I know the city well enough considering so you can always phone me whenever."

Bold of him to assume we'll still be together. Then again, why wouldn't we?

"Thanks Matty." I fixed my position again to face the television. "Still not gonna let you change my mind on doing my tourist things, y'know."

"Big Ben is not a must see sight I don't understand why you need to see it." His annoyed tone sent me laughing hysterically and he hugged under his breath, leaning down to smother me in kisses only to continue my laughter until I met his lips with my own.

A/N HAPPY 2K READS! Thank you guys so much for supporting this fic so much, it means everything to me ❤️ especially since this story in particular has a special place in my heart from my own personal history and to see it being enjoyed is honestly the best thing ❤️ love y'all so much

~J.S. 💋