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Chapter 3

Chapter dedicated to ShawnMendesLover6703

Shania's P.O.V.

I sighed and stared at the blank TV in front of me. Like every single day. It was actually getting quite boring, but I didn't know what to do with myself. With Hiroki gone to the cemetery, I had nothing to do at home. Not that we would do much anyway, but at least, with him home, I had the instinct to try and make things as comfortable as possible for him.

We hadn't talked much ever since her death. We didn't actually know what to talk about, and we were both too broken to even try to think of something to say. So we'd ended up as strangers, in a certain way; we both had our own rooms now, where we spent most of the day, sometimes only seeing each other for meals, or when we went to class. Because life continued, and we still had to go through the motions of it. Even if we didn't want to. Even if we wanted to curl up on our beds and cry and grieve and remember her. That's what Emilie had done for a while, before her mother kicked her out of her bed, saying that doing nothing would only hurt her more. So she decided to travel the world, and go to all the places she would have liked to visit with Leonora. I wondered how she did it.... how she managed to do things that weren't just routine. Maybe that was her way of grieving? Honoring her girlfriend's memory? I didn't know....

I didn't know either how Hiroki managed to go to the cemetery every single day. What did he do there? He always came back with red puffy eyes, so I guessed that he'd cried, but I wondered what pulled him there. Wasn't it too painful to see her grave? To see her name etched into the stone, and feel all over again the pain of standing there at the funeral, watching her casket being lowered into the ground, wanting to scream for them to stop because she couldn't be dead, because everything had to be a mistake, it couldn't be real.

Except that it was real. And it was all our fault. We had failed to protect her from her family, although we'd sworn to do so. We'd sworn that her sister would never get to her, ever again. But she had, and now Leonora was dead. All because we had failed to protect her. I knew that Hiroki felt the same, I could hear him plead for forgiveness in his nightmares, when he cried, when he was sat in the locked bathroom, probably a razor in his hand. And I could do nothing to reassure him, because I felt the same, because I didn't know what I could say to make things better. I had not only failed Leonora, my best friend, but I was now also failing Hiroki, my boyfriend. And that hurt even more.

I looked up when I heard the door open. Seeing that it was Hiroki, I stood up and went there. He looked even deader than usual, his face completely drained of colour, and his hands shaking. What had happened to make him be like this? Had someone hurt him?

When he looked up at me, my heart shattered even more, because of the pain and fear and regret in them. What did he have to regret? What had happened?

"I'm leaving."

🥢🥢

Hi there lovelies!

How are you all? Sorry that this short chapter took so long, but I've been studying a lot so yeah. But hopefully I'll soon be able to post more, especially now that I know how I want the story to go exactly.

What did you think of this chapter? Sorry that it's so short..

Have a good day/night/evening!💖