self loved | e.d.

two

monday

"hey babe," cailey wrapped her cool arms around my neck. swerving her body motion to face my way.

"hey," my hands laid down along the side of her hips.

my eyes dart around the halls looking for someone in particular. jet came around the corner of the halls and smirked at me.

"aye dude," he gave me a high five.

"sup," i said nodding my head. "gotta head to class babe," i told cailey giving her a kiss on the cheek.

"alright," she rolled her eyes walking away from me sassy.

i walked into the classroom and sat down beside jet. he was talking to some other guys from the football team.

"ethan, dude you and cailey was so loud friday night." mason said covering his mouth from laughing a bit.

making me smirk, "you know how it is."

"you're the shit," he gave me a regular dude handshake and began to talk more to me about the parties he's gonna throw over the weekends more.

as much as i want to go i can't. alcohol use to be my thing everyday. i've cut back a bit to try and pass this year. since it is coming to an in a couple of months. i thought i could put an end to the whole drinking situation.

my mind tells me to start drinking again over the summer. but i don't want to. i know i seem like a lame ass but it effects a lot of people.

it turns my teenage hormones on and makes me want to have sex. like what happened over the weekend. yeah, i wanted to have sex with cailey to get rid of the stress i've been having but i don't know anymore.

things are coming back that i don't want to. it's going to be bad.

hell, it's already started.

my pencil taps aggressively on the desk; echoing through the whole classroom.

"fucking stop would you?" the guy in front tells me.

"shut the fuck up," i talk back to him.

"what was that?" he yells.

my whole body shoots up from my desk; over looking at him in anger

"i said shut the fuck up."

he looks at my whole body knowing that i'll beat his ass if he speaks one more word.

"boys, settle down," the teacher yells at us.

my eyes dart over to the teachers desk, rolling my eyes from him trying to make me stop.

"pussy," the guy says.

my whole body starts to flow with anger. i can feel my face turning red.

my hands grab onto the guys shirt, pulling him up to my height.

he looks down below him seeing how much taller i am now than he thought he was.

i come face to face with him, "say it again i dare you."