self loved | e.d.

sixteen

*the next day*

walking to school was quite calming.

hearing the autumn leaves crunch beneath my feet gave me a satisfaction.

the temperature was perfect. not too hot nor cold.

perfect to were you can wear sweaters and not get hot.

halloween is coming around next month and i'm not as excited as i usually am.

i've got better things planned than just go out and hang with friends.

which i don't have in any case.

my whole life has been trapped.

with how my parents are going.

my friends.

my feelings.

everything.

the only person i could trust was ethan.

but turns out he was just trying to get with me.

everyday i'd wake up smiling knowing that i'll talk to ethan. be near his presence.

get to know the kid better.

you're falling for him. my consciousness told me.

i sighed to myself and kept on walking towards the school.

student, once again, crowd themselves back into the hell hole waiting for the day to be over with.

vanessa was no where to be found in the morning.

she's been becoming distant with me lately too.

do people not like me that much?

am i that annoying?

questions fill my head trying to seek for answers, but they wasn't for me to answer.

i twist the combination into my cold metal locker, grabbing the books i need for first period.

my mind flashes back to monday morning.

same place, same time.

having the feeling of him hovering over me again.

students disappear more and more as the seconds pass by in a faster pace.

making the halls less loud and claustrophobic.

slight breathing was heard from behind me.

knowing who that is, i decide to not turn around.

his presence makes my body freeze. makes me numb.

when his fingers grab onto me, a joint of electricity flys through my body.